Category Archives: Life – Death

Says 262 – A Shift in Energy – A New Reality

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10:40 pm – I’ve noticed a subtle shift in energy with the people in the building that I live in.  At first it was just Bob. We used to talk and joke around last summer, but by late fall, I sensed him pulling away and avoiding me. Mike, who is now dying, was also acting strange at the time.

Yesterday, I noticed other tenants and the landlord in the backyard. I joined them as they were discussing Mike’s situation. The whole conversation felt “off,” in a way that is difficult to describe. He wasn’t dead, yet they were talking about potential tenants, and getting rid of his “stuff.” Within a couple of minutes of me joining the group, the conversation changed topic. The whole situation felt odd and I felt estranged, out of place, like in a different reality, one that I didn’t belong in or one that they didn’t want me to be in.  I can’t really put my finger on it, but it felt weird.

11.30 pm – Now that I’ve reflect on it, it’s not just these people but others as well. As people that were chatty before have suddenly gone silent, while others that were silent, have become talkative and engaging. Is this the beginning of the separating of the denial Spirits and the Spirits in denial, from those choosing to end their denials? Is this the separation of the two realities, the duality that we have been living in for eons? This isn’t just being intuitively aware of loving and unloving energies, but actually sensing and seeing unloving denial energy people move away from you, or loving ones being drawn to you on a physical level.  Is this a step in creating our new reality, our new world?  Moving out of the world of illusion and into the real world. Things that make you go… hummmmm?

Says 244 – Quickening vs awakening

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I feel that people have a misguided sense, or use of the word awakening… or maybe I just look at it a different way. I feel that what people are presently going through is what I call a “quickening,” an acceleration process in recognizing what is not life, or contributing to life. Denials are being exposed and the truth revealed, but that doesn’t mean that people are awaking to end their own denials and begin to live life, and not the illusion as has been the case.

People get caught up in the New Age mumbo jumbo and hype, and talk of awakening and ascension, not unlike a born again Christian that claims to be “saved,” and yet they are oblivious to what truth, love and life are. They are still disconnected from recognizing the Divine aspects of their Physical Being, or how denial of these are being reflected in their experiences and reality. Yes, their consciousness is stirring, but by no means are they wake as they claim to be.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m far from being fully awakened, but I have done a lot of personal inner work and healing on ending my denials that is being reflected in my outer reality. What I see people going through is what I went through years ago, “Been there done that.” While they are becoming aware of the issues in their OUTER reality, or the blatant lies and denials of others, they are still oblivious as to how to heal their personal inner issues by recognizing and choosing to end their denials. They wear masks to hide the truth and act the role that their altered ego ignorantly believes will make them happy.

Says 237 – Heart speaks to Spirit (Mind)

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237-heart-mindDec 01 3:35 pm – I began what I thought would be a meditation and suddenly became aware that my Heart was talking to my Spirit (Mind). I’m writing this after the fact as I didn’t want to disrupt the dialogue. Heart was asking it to stop running and busying itself with things that didn’t matter and to do what it says it wants to do, that of healing the Body and Will and that every time the real issues are brought up, it runs and distracts itself.

What Spirit is afraid of is DEATH and so a weak, ill and hurting Body is a sign that death is near and as Spirit has never experienced death as the Will (Soul) and Body have, it is terrified to even try to understand what is happening and why, and how its denials of the Will and Body have been causal and have created the illness, injury and aging and the slow decent toward death.

It’s time that Spirit honor its INTENT to heal the Will and Body and to see and feel what it has never seen and felt because it was afraid it would not survive if it did. But now, if it doesn’t, there is a good chance that it will just keep repeating the cycle of reincarnation.

237-every-issues-in-the-bodyHearts message was that it is also time to heal all aspects of our Being, Will, Body, Heart and Spirit that has also lost Essence, power, gifts and talents. That it is now time to accept all things that Spirit has feared, rejected, denied and cut off from its love and light. All lost parts of the Will are scattered and held in the Body. That where Spirit and Spirit Heart had judgments on the Will and Body, that there are either only partial connections there or none at all and only Heartlessness and indifference. There was no bonding and so there isn’t any love or life in these areas, only unlovingness and mistrust.

I can’t remember all that was said as I just went with the flow and was feeling and expressing any emotions that were coming up. But afterwards, I did feel a shift in energy, now how it plays out will need to be seen and felt.

Says 234 – Another view of life, death and Body

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“Doctors had given Anita Moorjani just hours to live when she arrived at the hospital in a coma on the morning of February 2nd, 2006…”

234-woman-dying-obeThis is a good video watch to expand your mind… (Video at bottom of page) She gives an interesting metaphor, and also gives an example.. She also shares the five most important things you can do with your life, although she misses out on how you can free your mind from the imprints, programs and beliefs to enable you to do that, as your FEARS are what your mind doesn’t want to deal with.   Notice that she doesn’t once mention RELIGION.

Says 231 – How we kill ourselves

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It’s interesting that this Meme came up on my Facebook page as I’m presently working on healing my Body. I don’t mean heal in the present social mindset, I mean heal on all levels. What I’ve discovered before in healing my emotions, was that what we deny, basically begins to die. Now I’m finding out that we do the same with our Body.

When our Body is sick or injured, we THINK we are helping our body by giving it medicine or whatever: However this is what the MIND believes (imprints, programs and beliefs) will FIX the Body and get it back to doing what the Mind wants it to do, so that the Mind can be happy. Illness and injury is the Body’s way of trying to tell the Mind that something is wrong that the Mind needs to look at. When the Mind denies the Body’s needs, the Mind does the same thing to the Body that it does with the Emotions, KILL it.. and so the Body slowly dies, and with it, a part of our Spiritual Essence is lost.

Says 230 – Realizations on Healing the Body

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I spent more than two hours (in the middle of the night) writing 11 1/2 pages in my journal. I’m posting it in its entirety as I want you to see how the thought/feeling process unfolded and how I gained realizations as to how to heal my Body. The story begins with a recount Saturday afternoon experiences that triggered the middle of the night writings. Sorry that it’s kind of long. I was going to break this down into two or three segments, but felt it would fragment the flow of acquiring this realization.

230-back-pain2016 November 19 Saturday 2:30 pm – I had gone to the farmers market and while there I got a pain behind my right shoulder blade and spine that ran up to my neck. It was especially painful and felt like a knot or kink, but I don’t know what caused it. Another thing is that my right hip was also sore and hurting.

I lay down to have a brief nap and reflect on my shoulder and I got that it’s involved with a car accident, and more.  I flashed to seeing the woman in her SUV going through the intersection and I slammed on the brakes. On impact, my right leg was pressing on the brake pedal and that resulted in my right hip not moving forward like my left one as my left leg was not braced in the same way. This, and the fact that I was thrown into the driver’s door helped to twist my hip. In a similar fashion, my right and left arm were braced for impact and the jarring impact, followed by the twisting action of being hurled into the driver’s door twisted my right shoulder neck and spine.

But, there’s more. While all this was going on, my mind was thinking of survival and denied any emotional and physical expression except those that supported its survival mentality, like focusing on things that were OK, with little consideration or recognition of the real pain in the body that was numb and in shock, and unable to express itself as it needed to. It was only hours and days after the accident when the shock wore off that my mind became aware of the damage that had been inflicted on my Body, and even then, it was only related to the pain that the body was feeling at the time, that the Mind didn’t want to feel, and not what actually happened to the body, or what help the body needed to allow it to heal itself.

I got up and did two exercises from the Rudolph Stone Polarity Therapy book, chart 63 and 64, and my shoulders and lower back feel  a bit better. I still feel a pinched nerve in my left shoulder but overall, I’m not in the pain I was in before.

So now the question is how do I heal my physical body?, When I was working on healing my emotions, I would remember the traumatic experiences, and my Spirit (Mind) would allow my Soul [Will] to express everything that it never got to express during the original experiences, like heartbreak, terror, anger, rage, aloneness, unloved, betrayal, manipulated, etc. As I wrote that, I flashed to some of the healing experiences I witnessed when working with others, and while some of the previous mentioned emotions were involved, it was guilt and shame that were stored in the body, that negatively affected the physical body with aches, pains, and disabilities. Once they released the guilt and shame energy they had been holding, the body immediately responded with health and well being. So now the questions are; where does the body store any so-called negative feelings and emotions like heartbreak, betrayal, unloved, alone, etc., and how does one release them? Also, where and how does the body’s own feelings, emotions and pain get stored [trapped] in the body, and how does one release them?

November 20, Sunday 2:50 AM

230-boy-sad2:50 am – As mentioned, I had a real pain in my back between my shoulder blades and into my neck yesterday. I just got up now to go to the bathroom, and my back felt a bit better. I also got the feeling that it’s associated with the betrayal and heartbreak of getting blindsided and stabbed in the back. Not expecting to be hurt that way from people I loved and trusted. Suddenly feeling flooded with pain, disbelief and shock, and heartbroken and betrayed and not knowing what to say in a moment as you are too numb to even respond and so you react and pretend [deny] that it’s not happening and that its normal, going to be OK, that it’s just a dream, that you were wrong, or that they did mean it and were just joking.

I just remembered a poem I wrote in my teens and early twenties, that I shared in my third book. The poem is titled, Temp/Anger, and it’s basically all about this issue. Wow! It’s all about SURVIVAL, and how I have taken in unloving energy and have been holding it in my spine, my chakras, and other parts of my body.

3:10 am – I just had a brief flutter of heartbreak but it came and went just as fast, but at least it moved.

I just flashed different [unexpected and unpleasant] experiences that I’ve had, and also good experiences, where I deliberately shot myself down for fear of getting hurt again, so it’s a better that I ended as it will hurt less. This was mainly with relationships, especially female, where I’d either convinced myself they were not interested in me, or that they were too good for me, or that I wasn’t good enough for them. I flashed through my teenage years of feeling ashamed of not only me, but my parents as well for being poor. I didn’t want to have a girlfriend for fear of having her find out how poor we were.

Starting school was a big time shock for me. Besides the physical, mental and emotional abuse, I felt heartbreak and betrayed by my parents, teachers and peers. I also felt an overwhelming feeling of heartlessness being directed at me with no real way of not taking it in. In believing that what was happening to me was my fault, and also based on my religious indoctrination (RC) beliefs of TRUSTING PEOPLE, thinking that they were as loving as I was. Giving them the benefit of the doubt time and time again that I heard known, or convincing myself to wait and see what else they had the say that would clear up my doubts.

230-mind-control3:25 am – This seems like a repeat of what I went through in healing my Will, but yet it seems like on a different level, as the feelings and emotions are more like shadows, and not as strong and powerful like I had previously experience. Aha! – I just realized that while I was able to move my emotions that I had denied expression, I hadn’t moved all the unloving denial energy that I had taken in during and after those experiences. I hadn’t moved the feelings my Body had experienced.  I denied myself even to the point of shutting down my physical talents and gifts so that I wouldn’t upset people, so that they would like and accept me.

I just felt more feelings of heartbreak that came and went again just as quickly.

I feel I’ve cut off and denied so much of myself, my innocence, that if I compare all my Essence when I incarnated to what I have left now, it’s like my physical body compared to my left hand. I’ve lost almost all of me, not lost, more like I can’t find. But yes, lost in that I denied and cut them off. Aha! I just realized that it’s more like this is how much unloving denial energy of others that my physical body is holding in these parts of me, energy that is not mine and is of reversed polarity.

It is my intent to move any and all unloving energy and Essence that is not mine from my body. From my physical, mental, emotional and etheric bodies and chakras, and to send it back to where it came from or to its right place, so that I can heal all aspects of me.

I just added that I want to transform my own reversed polarity unloving energy that is in the form of an attachment to people places and things. That while I had no conscious intent to harm or over-power, it still is unloving through the unseen role of denial and needs to be transformed. Connections yes, attachments no.

3:45 am – I was just thinking of how I hated my body for being small, weak, different, and unacceptable. I even remember going through a stage where I wanted to change my name, thinking that would change things. I hated my body for being sick, hurt, or injured as if it was my body’s fault for what it was experiencing and for not being able to do what I (my Mind) wanted it to do.

(Again I felt some emotions move briefly.)

I pushed my body even when it was sick or hurt to do what I felt I needed to do, which was to SURVIVE this fucking cruel world. Humph!!! I have to die to live and isn’t that fucked up?

(Now I’m feeling and expressing some anger and rage.)

230-mind-king-of-dead-bodyWhoa! I just realized that I unconsciously kill my essence in order to do what I believe is needed to live. I cut off and deny parts of me that are hurt and wounded so that the rest of me can go on with this illusion called life. WTF! Now I feel numb. I’m in shock at that realization and how close I’ve come to almost having to leave my physical body and the Essence I’ve abandoned and denied, thereby giving Lucifer what he wants.

FUCK THAT!  FUCK YOU LUCIFER! You’re not going to win.

I just flashed to the light and dark wizards duel and how I lost a major part of my Essence there. I intend to get those parts back also. I’m getting all parts of me that I’ve denied and lost in all time, and dimensions. I intend to recover all parts of my Being. I will not stop until every last part of me that is out there and being held by unloving light is back into my Essence. I will move any and all unloving light back to whom or where it belongs, to its right place. I no longer accept it in and upon me. I ask for help from Mother and Father and all my guides that are here to assist me to help me in whatever way is appropriate and serves  my highest purpose, love, and light.

4:10 am – I just realized that taking medicine, pain relievers, and even chiropractic treatments and massage, etc., and even using heat and baths are unloving and controlling. While it APPEARS you are loving yourself, it is in reality [through the unseen role of denial] actually your mind trying to force the body not to be sick, weak, or in pain.

FUCK this is SUBTLE!

But the underlying intent is still unloving if it’s not what the Body is asking for, but what the Mind wants the Body to do so that it can do what it wants and be happy. It’s more unloving light that is actually the Mind that has been imprinted and program; that it is in control, that it is the master, that it knows what is best for all. I now recognize that it is my light that has reversed its polarity and has become unloving light and has been slowly killing me, although it was unconscious and unaware that it was doing so.

Aha! I realize that by denial, I’ve taken in, accepted; unloving light that has imprinted and programmed my Mind to control the rest of my Being. The more I denied, (what I believed was wrong with me) the more I changed from the loving light I was, to become what I am now. I thought my light was wrong and that this unloving light that I took in was right. That I needed to be like the others in order to live and be happy like them and that is totally FUCKED! My intent is to let go of any and all unloving imprints, programs, and beliefs that would have me reverse my lights polarity, from loving to unloving. I ask for help to become aware when I’m doing this so that I can end this action that has been slowly killing me, as what I desire is life and love.

230-i-forgot-to-live4:30 am – Having to go to school to learn things so that you can get a job and earn money, to pay for things that enable you to survive for a few years, until you grow sick and old and are of no further use and die. This reality is forced upon us the day we are born. We grow old and these imprints, programs, and beliefs are what we take to the grave, or rather have been. I’m not buying that reality any longer and I let go of those imprints, programs and beliefs.

You force your Mind to control your emotions, and you force your Body to do the things it does not want to do so that the Mind can get what it believes is the power [money] to enable it to do what it thinks it needs and wants to be happy, and to also support the family with shelter, food, clothing, and the pleasures of this so called life. This reality is actually a hideous energy form sucking the life out of our loving Bodies through our denials and willingness to be like them, the “Otherkin,” those that do not belong in this universe and that need to be moved to the right place.

4:40 am – This is somewhat of a rehash of what I went through and know several years ago, but now it takes on a new feeling and meaning. I’m also beginning to feel a new life force rising in me, a new conviction and determination, and new purpose, or maybe it’s just a rekindling of an old flame that has been put aside to finish the books and that part of my journey. Whatever it is, I like it.

4:50 am – I asked my Body to show me what it needs to show me, to move any unloving light that it is holding and help me transform any reversed polarity parts of my light. I asked it also to show me any lost Will energy that it is holding and the unloving energy that is associated with it, so that I can recover lost Will Essence and move out unloving energy.

230-baal5:05 am -I closed my eyes and saw several dark forms moving before me. Lucifer, Baal, Melchizedek, and others, hovering over me, cussing and name calling, stating that I can’t do what I’m doing and that they are not through with me, that they will stop me. I smiled as that was what they were saying the last time I was close to a breakthrough. This time I rolled over and went to sleep, and woke up at 9:15 am.

 

To understand what life is, you need to understand what Death is.

Says 229 – Death and Dying

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I didn’t post this before as I felt confused, and felt it had no bearing on the material I was presently sharing, but with what I experienced on Nov, 20, that I will share later, it is very relevant.

2016 Nov 11 Friday

229-near-death-experience3:35 am – I woke up thinking about death that I had been dreaming about. The only reason people feel a profound sense of peace when they die, (and then come back to life) is that they’ve only experience the sensations of their Spirit (Mind), as all else, the things that were troubling Spirit like feelings and emotions and physical aches, pains and disease have been left behind, and the Spirit (mind) is no longer aware of them. The only feelings and emotions that they take with them when they temporarily die are the ones they have acceptance for, the ones that gave them pleasure. All the rest are not accepted, are denied and become lost essence and will be what they will add to the other essence they cast off and  rejected in past lives that they will again try to reclaim in their next reincarnation.

While this first glimpse of the afterlife may feel euphoric and peaceful, if they don’t come back, it’s another story, as they eventually realize what they’ve lost and it is then that they choose to try to reclaim this lost essence by reincarnating again. Unfortunately, the knowing of what needs to be done and how to do it is lost when the Spirit and Soul reincarnate. And by the time they are old enough to be able to begin the recovery, they’ve lost almost all memory of what they knew when they were in the nonphysical reality of spiritual energy. And so they have to physically, mentally and emotionally experience the issues that they reincarnated to heal and reclaim. To them it will feel like a burden, a curse, and being a victim with only pain and suffering to endure until such time as Spirit feels it can no longer stay with an aging or diseased body, and chooses once again to shed the physical Body it does not desire and return to the nonphysical realm of existence.
229-organ-donation6:33 am –  Spirit (Mind) has never experienced death and that is the reason society has the belief that death is nothing to fear, that it’s a welcome transition from the drudgery and dreariness of the physical body (for any number of reasons) to that of the peace and serenity of the afterlife. Once the Spirit has truly crossed over with no chance of returning to the physical Body and Soul it has abandoned, it reconnects with this higher self, the part of its Being that has remained in the higher vibrational energy of the Spirit realm. The Soul however, remains with the physical Body after Spirit and Heart have left, and slowly begins to withdraw her essence from the Body through a process that lasts from 3 – 5 days. The Soul first withdraws from the limbs and then the internal organs. By the way, the medical community does not transplant dead organs; they harvest and transplant living organs that still have Soul essence in them. That is why some people that receive a organ feel some of the emotional memories of the donor.  That’s also why there is the custom of not burying a person for at least three days following their death.

To understand what life is,

you need to understand what Death is.

Says 181 – Love is not an emotion

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LOve is not an emotionContrary to popular opinion, Love is not an emotion. It is a energy, a frequency or vibration that can be felt by not just empaths, but by animals, plants and the Earth itself. Not all energy is loving  and unloving (reversed polarity) love energy seeks to close, compress and control, while Unconditional Love is open, expanding, and evolving. Love, is the essence of life, while denial of love seeks death.

This concept will put an entirely new spin on what you thought love is, and the words, “I love,” will take on a different meaning and dimension. Love with conditions, or when denial is present, is what we are presently experiencing in varying degrees, and is also why we have disease and death.  Ending our denials and expressing the truth is what will enable us to create the life we desire, and yet to dream, here on Earth.

Says 173 – Politics and Religion

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HarperPope Francis at St Peter'sPolitics and religion are indeed bedfellow. Politicians claim to look after your best interests in your physical life, while religions claim to do so in the afterlife, when you die. Of course, both want something from you for their “services.” Not only do they want your blood, sweat, tears and money; they also want your undying loyalty and devotion to their dogma and cause. As long as the sheeple believe what they, the politicians and religions are selling, they are not only trapped and become slaves to their beliefs, but also controlled by the dictators they admire and adamantly defend, even with their lives.

Says 154 – The Death of the Altered Ego

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154 - The death of the altered Ego - NOT

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This is another picture/word message that I got off the internet. The original image words, “The death of the ego will be the beginning of your real life,” is a part truth. As you can see, I’ve “altered” the image (no pun intended.) 🙂

The following article is taken from my soon to be published second book titled, “My Journey – Three Levels of Healing – Feeling, healing and understanding.” The old “pre-published edition” can be downloaded ( free) from my website at http://shenreed.com/index.html

Our Ego has gotten a bum rap in that it’s our Ego that defines who we are. Our ego is unique; it separates you from me and all the others. The problem is not our Ego but our Altered Ego, altered by our imprints, programs and beliefs and by the many other voices (internal and external) that tell it that it must do this or that to either be accepted or to be in control. Little does the Mind realize that in listening to these other voices, that it’s being altered and controlled. The altered ego is the fake persona or personality that is in a position of power and control as it is not only in control of our Mind, but also the rest of our Being. It also strives to extend its influence and dominate the environment around it, be it people, places or things. The Altered ego is the individual that searches for acceptance and approval outside itself. It strives for success and recognition and defines who they are by their status, achievements, possession, wealth and power. There is also the opposite end where the individual will appear to be a powerless, helpless victim, but it is all an act in that by being considered a victim, they are actually dictating and controlling others around them.

The trouble is that while our Ego is altered, it is also disconnected from our Higher Self Spiritual source. Instead of communicating with our Higher Self, our Ego is being controlled by the unloving voices of the Inner Critic, guilt, shame and denied rage, to name a few. I’m sure that you’ve had several conversations with your Inner Critic when it is telling you what you should or shouldn’t do. Once you begin to end your denials, the inner voices also begin to be silenced and your Ego then begins to communicate with your Higher Self, and that’s when life gets interesting. Your Ego, your true self wants to free itself of the unloving grip of its old imprints, programs and beliefs and also of any unloving energy that has been, and is trying to control it.

154 - Tree in forestA rather simplistic way to look at our Ego is to compare it and ourselves to a tree. While a tree can be one of millions of similar species in a forest, it’s still unique and has its own consciousness. If it were to try to become another tree, to have a different bark, leaves or fruit, or if it wanted to be bigger or change its position, then there would be issues, not only for it, but also for the other trees in the forest that it would affect as it tries to control and change its environment. Another simplistic, but classic example of an altered ego can be found in the tale of “The Ugly Duckling,” by Hans Christian Andersen.

Says 122 – 2012-12-21 The end of the World

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End of world as we know itIt’s the beginning of the collapse of the system and the world as we know it, and
the beginning of a new world without the political and religious crap. What is happening now is that all the denials and shit is getting exposed and as it does, the system begins to fall and truth becomes the normal behavior…

Says 97 – The walking dead

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2012 Sept 25, I drove into Woodstock to look at a room that I saw listed on Kijiji. It turns out that the man is dying of cancer and has only a few months left to live. It started out in his colon, then moved to his liver and is now in his lymph glands, that can’t be operated on. He said that he maybe has four months, and that he hopes to see this Christmas, but that he doubts he will see another one. He said that besides having his colon removed, he had 5/8 of his liver removed, as well as a node that they later found on it. He now has a hernia protruding out of his abdomen where his liver used to be. He looks fine and healthy while he is sitting down. He seems quite calm, cool and collected in talking about his illness and imminent death, but that is NOT what is really going on. He’s a walking dead man. How does one deal with that? Again, I’m witnessing what is going on behind the scenes.

While we were talking, his wife took a phone call and went outside on the patio to talk. I asked him why he wants to rent out a room, something that they have never done before, if he has all this going on as it will just add stress to your relationship with your wife that is working and also looking after you. He didn’t reply to my questions, but said that another person, a nurse, was coming over later this afternoon to have a look at the room and that if she didn’t want it, that I could have it. I said that a nurse staying here would be of help to him and his wife as she could provide some assistance if needed. With that, I said my goodbyes and left.

2012 Sept 26, I received an email stating that the room had been taken.

Says 75 – Evolution not Revolution

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In going through my stuff, I had picked up an old business card from a Doctor I visited when I was out West. I noticed the name of the Health care centre (clinic) that he worked out of at the top of the card, but what caught my attention wasn’t the name, but the caption underneath it that read,

“A Revolution in Health Care”

I thought about it for a few seconds and realized that any REVOLUTION doesn’t really change anything as a revolution by definition is simply a rotation of 360 degrees, a complete circle or cycle ending back at the same point. While it’s true that people, places and things can change with each revolution, what doesn’t change are the basic thoughts, ideas, imprints, programs and beliefs that the people have. When people feel they are being controlled and over-powered, they seek to overthrow those they feel are in a position of power so that they can become the ones in power and in control. So in reality there is only a change in form.

Later I thought that what we need is not a revolution, to overthrow the powers to be, but an evolution, a letting go of all our old imprints, programs and beliefs that will then enable us to create what we really desire in a totally new way, from a new blueprint. Humanity needs to awaken to a new awareness of themselves and all that is around them. To see themselves for who they really are, and not what they think and believe they are and what society presently projects they should be or try to be. They need to become aware that they are a Spiritual Being having a physical experience, and not just a physical Body coping as best they can with the life they are experiencing, and waiting for death to become a spiritual Being and have a better life. Humanities thinking is all backwards.

Says 39 – Realization that love is polarized

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2012 April 08 Sunday, I have had the experience and understanding of what conditional and Unconditional love was for a few years now. Post 866 Insight into Conditional and Unconditional love That love has extremes that move from the darkest feelings of psychopathic loathing, hatred and cold indifference, all the way to conditional love in a state of mindless bliss, and then to Unconditional love where there are no attachments, conditions, judgments or denials. From being negative, domineering and controlling, to being positive, open and free. While I knew all this, what I realized today was that love was polarized, and I never thought of it that way before.

Polarity is the expanding principals or forces of the same essence or thing, and moving in opposite directions, away from each other. Hot-cold, dark-light, left-right, forward-reverse, large – small, and the list goes on and on. To an observer, polarity has no real meaning, as it is merely a mental concept as you would not know what hot or cold was by looking at it, unless you had some personal experience. It’s only when you experience it from a subjective state, and sense and feel the experience that you begin to understand the various attributes of that essence.

I feel there is more to it as I feel that love is also associated with life and death, from essence that desires life, to essence that desires unconsciousness and death, and everything in between. Everything is energy and is connected with love, which is life. It really doesn’t matter where anyone is on the grand scale of things as they are in their right place…………………………………….

Ahhhhh… As I wrote that last line I felt that is not the truth or we wouldn’t be in the mess that we are in. That is what this shift that is coming is all about, moving everyone and everything to its right place so that it will like what it feels. That there will no longer be the mixing together of the different essences as that is what has created the conflict in creation. While polarity provides infinite possibilities with which to experience manifestation, it is only when these polarities are intertwined or over lapping that duality is created, which brings us to the nature of good and evil.

Hummm……   This is all beginning to make sense to me in a new way.

Says 34 – Letting go of the Old world and creating a new World

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2012 March 30 6:40 am I awoke and was thinking of all the things that are wrong in this world and I began to write a list.

Corrupt government, federal, provincial, and municipal
Religious beliefs and conflict
The wars and military spending
Pharmaceutical drugs and medical care
High gas, food, electrical and housing prices
High CATV, satellite, telephone, cell phone and internet prices
GMO foods and animals
Polluted land, water and air
Chemtrails and government cover-up
Big brother watching you
And the list goes on and on.

I then though, this is way too much to try to fix and that the only way we are going to change things is to let go of it and let it self destruct and then we’ll build a brand new world to rise out of the ashes like the fabled Phoenix. By self-destruct, I don’t mean that the World (Earth) should be destroyed, but that the SYSTEMS that are presently in a position of power be destroyed. When they are gone, along with those that support that system; those that remain can then begin the process of creating a New World with a new blue print of how reality can be when denials are ended.

Says 33 – Message on Clearing illness and aging from the Body.

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2012 March 30 2:30 am, Before I went to bed I was read a few pages in the “Right Use of Will” RUOW (Page 2) on clearing illness and habits. When I went to bed, I had been thinking of how to heal my Body and later I awoke hearing the following message. I reached now and picked up my journal that I have between my night table and my bed , turned the light on and began to write the following message.

Say this aloud and make it your intent.

Body, I am here to help you heal yourself. What is it that you desire me to help you come into full Being? I will listen to your wants, needs, and desires and will do my best to fulfill them? I know that I have not listened to you in the past and have gotten you to do what I wanted and thought was the right thing. I know you are also holding a lot of the Wills denied energy and I am ready to help you release it and to help you and the Will heal and come into full consciousness, glory and power. This is my intent, This is my intent with Body, Will and Heart. I ask that you teach me, to help me listen to you, and to know that it is your Will, your true desire. It is time to end this battle, this struggle, as it is life that we all desire and so to achieve that, we all need to let go of all that does not serve our highest purpose and good.

We sense your doubt and fear, and like your brothers comment to Peter “O thou of little faith, wherefore didst thou doubt,” we want to add, that what he did not say was that,” You know that all things are possible, you have only to imagine them and they will manifest for your experience.”

I ask Father, Mother and the Company of Heaven to help me, help us bring Heaven to Earth and to live life as we have never know it. Amen.

Says 27 – The cause of all illness and aging is denial

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2012 March 19, The present issues I’m working on is healing my Body and manifesting my desires and that includes dealing with illness and aging that are manifested by the Body. While there are countless forms of disease, there is only one underlying cause, and that is denial. Denial, the denied energy (reversed polarity) from all parts of the self is what causes the disease and aging. Although it’s not obvious, it’s the unseen role of denial that is the root of our beliefs and judgments, and I’ve found that one of the biggest limitations and judgments on our Being is our social and personal definitions of who and what we are. If you make a list of all your negative “I am” faults, you will have a record of all your limiting beliefs and judgments. Some of my limiting “I am” beliefs and judgments are:

I am getting old because:
I’m not as strong as I once was
I’m not as energetic as I once was
I am getting white hair
I am losing my hearing
I am losing my eyesight
I am feeling pain in my bones
I am feeling pain in my muscles

While I have some knowledge, insights and understandings into the issues in my life from my past emotional healing experiences, I still don’t have the understandings I need to solve this current illness and aging issue with my Body. I have yet to apply my knowledge and experience it in a real life situation, in the “now” or present moment, to see if what I think I know, really works.

The cause of all pain and suffering is denial.

Says 17 – Past memories of dying

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2012 Feb 19 12:30 am Sunday, I just had a memory flashback of not wanting to die and how panicked my Mind was. It was in morbid terror, not wanting to die.  I don’t know where this feeling and image came from as I was just drifting off to sleep when I was startled by it.

A few seconds later I had flashed back to my childhood when my mother tried to drown me and how I felt free when my Spirit was out of my Body,  Hovering above my Body that lay still and motionless in a small bathtub, relieved that it (the hate) was finally over and that now I could have peace.

Then I flashed back to the night I was conceived and again the feelings of not wanting to be here, as there was no love.  Although they were married, my father was basically raping my mother. But this feeling of wanting to leave feels different than the previous one. It’s more like Heart feeling he didn’t want to be here as it was not the love and life he desired, or expected.

Humm, this is getting complicated.

Says 15 – Stopping the cycle of death and reincarnation

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February 18 7:15 AM So in order to stop the cycle of death and reincarnation, and to bring all the presently untapped physical senses into reality, Spirit (Mind) has to begin to not only accept what the Body, Will and Heart are feeling in the present moment, but to also feel what happened to them  in the past. Spirit needs to go where it has never gone before and experience what it thinks will kill it, to a place where Will/Body were abandoned and left to die. It’s Body (form) that holds the most denials as even the Will gradually has to leave it, not that she wanted to, but she had no choice.

Feb 18 1:10 PM Not that all of Heart left after Spirit left, as only the part of Heart that is Spirit polarized left, leaving the Will polarized part of Heart to die along with Body and Will. I just felt the heartbreak of both Spirit polarity Heart in having to leave the Body/Will, and the Will polarity of itself and how he felt he had no choice, and how Will polarity Heart, felt broken, betrayed, alone and a host of other feelings and emotions. Will polarity Heart was also trapped in a dying Body and quickly losing consciousness, meaning that the physical heart and circulatory system and blood were also dying, and in the process, cutting off possibility of physical life from the rest of the Body.

This is horrible! What a fucking heartbreaking waste!  I don’t know what else I can call it as there are just too many feelings and words to describe what I just felt. It’s all based on imprinting that goes back to the very beginning, to original Cause.

Before you can know what life is, you need to know what death is.

To know what love is, you need to know what is not love.

If any part of us is in denial of another part of ourselves, that part being denied is receiving death.  So how can we call what we are experiencing life, when a part of us is dying? Cutting off parts of us that are dying only means that we are losing more consciousness and essence. Eventually Spirit, that is electric in nature, also dies because without the Wills Magnetic essence there is no longer the compliment of forces necessary for Spirit/Will to co-exist. Without the Yin, there is no Yang.

Says 14 – Body carrying the (LOAD = Lies, Omission, Avoidance, Denial)

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February 18 6:25 AM I was thinking about death and how Spirit (Mind) has never experienced what our Body and Will have experienced. When a person dies, it’s the Spirit (life force) that leaves first, and then, within a few seconds, Heart (represented by our physical heart) stops and with that, there is no longer any flow of the life force to nourish the Body.

The Will, being magnetic in nature, doesn’t leave the Body immediately, nor does she want to as life is what she desires, but without Spirit presence, to animate Body with life, the Body cannot exist in the form it had. Without Spirit, the Will is slowly forced to leave the Body, and as she leaves, the parts of the Body begin to return to the original essence and elements that it was made from. One thing I need to mention is that just because Spirit and Heart have left the Body/Will, that doesn’t mean that the Body’s  and Will’s ability to feel and sense what is going on has stopped, as only Body’s ability to move and respond has ceased to function. It can still feel pain in all those parts that still have Will presence, it just can’t move and respond to them.

It’s like a person that is in a coma and while they are unable to communicate, they are totally aware of what is going on, they just can’t move their eyes, speak, or even move their finger to show they are alive and aware of their surroundings and the physical and emotional pain they are in. A person in a coma still has some part of their Spirit essence in their Body as it hasn’t totally decided to leave, yet. It has lifted most of it’s essence and consciousness, except for what is needed to keep the body/Will alive.  Heart presence is still in the Body to maintain the flow of life essence. Left unattended, the person would be unable to feed or care for themselves and unless Spirit chose to return, a slow and agonizing dying process would follow until such time that Spirit did leave and Body/Will would feel abandoned, unloved, rejected, and heartbroken.

I just felt and realized that while Spirit has never experienced what Body and Will have, that there is a part of Heart essence that has remained and experienced an aspect of dying. Although this part of Heart has momentarily remained, it has only experienced Spirit leaving and only the very beginning of the emotional and physical pain that the Will and Body was feeling, as when it felt its terror of death, it was quick to follow Spirit. Spirits terror is to experience dying and death, as life is what it is, and Heart has similar issues. When Spirit (Mind) says that death is nothing, it is only nothing to Spirit because Spirit has never experienced it, so there was NO THING to experience.

Humm? This relates back to the beginning of how Spirit is in terror of losing any part of the Body’s FULL sensations, especially sight, and sound, as then it is in the dark, the unknown, and left to the remaining senses, of touch, taste and smell, feeling crippled and powerless.

Loss of the physical senses and the body’s physical abilities of its youth terrify the Spirit and is in part, the cause of aging, as Spirit tries to deny what has happened to Body as a result of the experiences it, and the Will have had to endure without the acceptance and help from Spirit. All the times when Spirit/Will/Body/Heart were confronted with traumatic experiences, Spirit did what it thought it needed to do in order to survive, by cutting off and denying the parts of itself, it’s Will, (feelings and emotions) as well as Body sensations.  It’s all these denials, (denied reversed energy) that the body is forced to hold and carry. It’s the LOAD (Lies, Omission, Avoidance, Denial)  that gradually weighs down the Body, causing it to move and react slower and not heal like it once did , and to also diminish its senses.  That’s when Spirit begins to become aware of the things it doesn’t like about the Body, which only adds to the denials that the Body is forced to hold, thus accelerating the process of illness and aging.

Note: In looking for an autopsy picture to use on my blog post I happened upon this picture and then followed it to the main website.  If you want to see and feel what a medical team does to a Body that is still alive, but can’t move, then visit this site.

I must warn you, the pictures are very graphic and disturbing.

Says 13 – The Body and its five senses

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2012 Feb 17 The Bodies sensations of sight, sound, taste, touch and smell are very much like the Will, in that they can differentiate between what is pleasant and what is not pleasant, loving and unloving. This is most evident with the senses of taste, touch and smell, as the Mind has formed judgments that override the input of sight and sound, with sight being the most overridden, as in the expression, “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.” This overriding of our Will, and Body is what is learned through our experiences.

Before I wrote the above paragraph, I was thinking of my hearing problem, and how I had difficulty hearing my brother last night when he came to visit me. I thought how strange and empty my world would be without sound and the ability to hear all the sounds I presently hear. I then closed my eyes and thought of all the objects, shapes, colors that would disappear if I also lost my sight, and how helpless I would be trying to make our my around and function.

All five of our senses have special properties that allow us to experience reality in different ways, and to lose even one would have a profound effect on our lives. For me, the senses I most value, in order of importance would be sight, sound, touch, taste, and smell. I feel there are even more physical senses that we possess, it’s just that we don’t know how, or we can’t use them at the present moment. I feel they are much like how we can use technology to expand our awareness, but we would not need technology to experience them, as we would be able to have these abilities naturally.