Says 55 – I’m Back on my Blog – Basic details of my trip out West

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I’m not going to go into any details, but simply give you an outline of what has happened these past two months. Seems like time is just flying.

May 22 – Drove to Edmonton where I met an internet friend – Rick
May 23 – 24 From Edmonton, drove to Kamloops, and then the next day to Kelowna where I tried to hook up with some old friends but that was not to be, as the stores had closed and people moved. Picked up some food poisoning from a curried chicken pita I ate for supper.

May 24 – 26 From Kelowna, I drove down to Osoyoos as I was planning to spend some time in the area. After Osoyoos, I was also planning to re-visit some hot springs around Cranbrook that I had been to in 2005 and then stop in and see a friend in Lethbridge on Monday, before heading back to Regina. While I had all these plans, I wasn’t in any mood to do any exploring as I wasn’t feeling well. With the weekend coming up, I decided to skip Osoyoos, and push on to Creston BC where I spent the night. Still not feeling well on Saturday morning, I decided to drive back to Regina, arriving around 8:30 pm.

NOTE: A couple of unusual things happened to me on my trip from Penticton to Cranbrook. I was driving through the mountains when suddenly I got very dizzy and felt disoriented. It felt like I was driving though waves, like the kind you see rising off the pavement on a hot summer day. I felt I had passed though an energy field of some kind that was physically affecting me, so much so that I had to stop and get out of the Honda and get grounded. It wasn’t until later that I realized that this area is the area where there have been minor earthquake activity. So now, I am wondering if what I was feeling and sensing was the energy of the pressure points in the Earths crust that eventually will cause an earthquake. Although the Earthquake map show them as only 2.1 in magnitude, I feel that much larger one will be occurring in this area that will also have a major effect on transportation and other services in this mountainous region.

Says 54 – And plans change again

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I had already cut out a side trip to the Yukon as I felt I would be pushing it, and when I did a mileage check s it turns out that trip was 4,500 km. It doesn’t seem far on a map, but when I began doing some mileage checks of my revised trip, I realized that driving to Port hardy at the end of Vancouver Island in BC meant that I would be driving close to 5,000 km. If I averaged 80km per hour, that would mean that I would be driving for 62 hours, and to do that in 7 days, would mean that I would be driving 9 hours a day, and that’s not holiday!

So I’ve now decided to shorten my trip again, this time to 3260 km, which is 40 hours of driving, (5.8 hours per day.) Now that schedule leaves me some time to enjoy the view, take some pictures and even go off on some side trips. I’d like to spend some more time around Osoyoos and re-visit some hot springs I found back on 2005.

Says 53 – Got a new vehicle and a change in plans.

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2012 May 15 I wanted to get a good look at a Toyota Rav’s and Honda CR-V as I’ve never really checked them out. I decided to stop in at Regina Honda and struck up a conversation with a used car salesman. It just so happened they had three used Hondas on the lot, a 2004, a 2000 and a 1997. The 2004 was out for a test drive for the rest of the day so I looked at the 2000. It looked in good shape and only had 134,000 km on it. I took it for a test drive and liked it so I picked up some money to make an offer. After the third offer, I got it for 10% more than I wanted to pay, but 33% less than he the dealer was asking.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

As I don’t live in Saskatchewan, I had to get a temporary vehicle permit (either 1 day or 8 days) so that I could get the Honda back to my sisters place,. I took the 8 day permit as that  would also enable me to drive it a few days to see if any problems pop up. The permit is only good for Saskatchewan so I can’t take it on my trip out West. Furthermore, I need to get another 7 day inter-provincial permit that is only good from Saskatchewan to wherever my home province is. That means I can’t sell my Tercel before my trip and that I’ll have to take my Toyota Tercel out West and then come back and sell it before I leave for Ontario. With all this, I decided to delete my planned trip up to the Yukon, as that will cut off 3 – 4 days of my trip and give me some time to sell the Tercel when I get back to Regina.

As you can see in the picture, the 2000 Honda CR-V is quite a bit bigger than my 1999 Toyota Tercel. Now I’ll have room to move.

Says 52 – Getting ready for short trip out West before heading back to Ontario

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On may 22 or 23, I’ll be heading further out West, and I’ll be traveling light, meaning that I’m not taking all my stuff on this trip. The first (1) leg of my journey I’ll be heading up to Edmonton to see a friend and from there, I’d like to take a trip up to the Yukon, just to say I’ve been there.  From there, I plan to make my way South through British Columbia to Vancouver and then take the ferry over to Vancouver Island, where I plan to do a little sightseeing.

After that (2) I’ll take the ferry back to Vancouver and begin to make my way back East to Lethbridge to see a friend, and then drop in to see my sister in Calgary, (if she is back from her Regina visit) before heading back to Regina by the end of the month.  My plan is then to take a couple of days to pack up all my stuff and then (3) leave Regina around June 4, or 5 and make my way back to Ontario, stopping in at a couple of friends in MIdland before heading back to Woodstock and area. All this is tentative in not having any more car issues.

Says 51 – Toyota Tercel fixed, looking at SUV’s

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I got my Toyota Tercel fixed on Friday May 11 and it only cost me $252,00 total… and that included having them service my front brake calipers. While it’s fixed, I’m also pissed off as this is the same oxygen sensor that I had replaced back on October 01 2010.

For the past couple of weeks, I’ve been looking at getting an older, small SUV like a Toyota Rav4, Honda CR-V, (Red Honda in Pic) Hyundai Tucson, and the Mitsubishi Outlander. I had looked at North American SUV’s and the only one I even considered a possibility was the Saturn Vue, even though it’s been discontinued due to the recession of 2008. When I called the dealer and asked how long parts were going to be available, he hesitantly told me that they were already scarce and that any parts had to be ordered from the USA and that usually took a couple of weeks. With that, I decided to cross the Saturn Vue off my list and just stick with the imports. So much for Made in America pride and know how. In my researching SUV’s I was amazed at how many North American cars use Japanese or other countries engines and drive trains. Detroit may have the engineering knowledge to make a better, more fuel efficient vehicle, but they can’t or don’t want to deliver. They are good at selling the sizzle and not the steak. And then, when they get into financial trouble, (like in 2008) it’s the taxpayers that bail them out, thanks to the corrupt and inept government officials.

I feel I need a bigger vehicle with more cargo area than the 11 cubic feet I presently have. I’m looking for something that can carry all my stuff and where I still have some room to move, beside just being able to drive it. I also want a vehicle that is higher off the ground as I’m getting tired of having to watch small things I’m driving over that hit the bottom of the car. I also want a vehicle with bigger tires as the Tercel’s 13 inch wheels just seems to drop into the smallest pot hole, where my old Nissan pickup truck just rolled over them. I’m looking at getting an older 1999 – 2005 vehicle as that is all that I can afford.

I’d like to buy a vehicle out here in Saskatchewan as they use very little salt on the roads in the winter time and the vehicles are not rusty like in Ontario. But buying a car out here is also more complicated as it’s out of province and I still need to get it safety certified and emissions tested back in Ontario if I am to get plates for it there. If I don’t find a reasonable one out West, I’ll just wait until I get back to Ontario and buy one there.

I’ve also started searching Kijiji for a room or a bachelor apartment to rent in Woodstock and the surrounding area. I’ve found a few, but whether they’ll still be there when I get down to Ontario is another question. My ex-wife said that I could stay at her apartment a couple of days while I looked around for a place

Says 50 – USA Military and Homeland Security consider 2GB RAM for notebooks as “dual use” and sales need to be registered.

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2012 May 09 I thought that if the increase in RAM helped my netbook, why not update my old Toshiba. I did a search and found that my old 2007 Toshiba Satellite A100 TA6 can be upgraded to 4GB of RAM. Originally it came with 1GB, but a couple of years after I got it I upgraded to 2GB, as that was as large a RAM I could get at that time. With this upgrade and my previous hard drive upgrade, I’ll now have a 2007 dual core laptop with 4GB RAM and a 500GB hard drive that is comparable to present laptops. The only difference is that I’m still running Windows XP (SP2).
I called Staples, but they didn’t have any 2GB PC2-4200 200-PIN DDR2 533MHz SO-DIMM RAM so I went on-line and found a company in the USA called Pro Memory upgrade that had what I needed so I placed my order for 2 sticks of RAM.

The next day I got an email asking me to fill out a form with the title…. “The U.S. Department of Commerce requires adherence to the following guidelines when exporting goods from the United States.” Apparently, a stick of 2GB Ram falls under military use “dual use” and so it has to be registered with numerous USA government agencies, including HomeLand Security. I just wanted to upgrade my laptop, not get involved with any military operation or be subject to military scrutiny and whatever other paranoid operations these military based agencies have. Anyway, I wrote an email back, politely telling them to cancel my order, as I don’t need the RAM that badly.

The irony and utter stupidity of all this is that 95% of all RAM and Hard Drive memory are either made in Thailand or China. Yet these idiotic bureaucrats and military robots focus to maintain control on products specifically designed for public use. Dah!

Says 49 – TuneUp Utilities and upgrade to 2GB RAM for Netbook

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2012 May 04 A couple of days ago I download a trail version of TuneUp Utilities and I was really impressed with how it cleaned up and sped up my Windows operating system on both my Toshiba laptop and my Toshiba Netbook. TuneUp Utilities also monitors and maintains the Windows operating system, and the nice feature is that if you think that it make a mistake, you can easily undo what was done, not like some programs I’ve tried that screwed up the registry to the point where even a system restore couldn’t fix the problems it created.

Another great feature is that it temporarily disables any programs that are running in the background, but that aren’t needed…. including bloatware in Windows 7. That feature is a big part of what makes the computer run faster. It really doesn’t interfere as when you want that program, like MS-Word, it automatically activates it and monitors it and when it is idle for 10 minutes, it disables it without you losing any data. Otherwise, even though you haven’t opened the software, it is running in the background and taking up RAM space that leaves less for other programs to use.

One recommendation the program had for my Netbook was to increase the size of the RAM from 1GB to 2GB. Later I went to Staples Business Depot and bought a 2GB RAM that they just happened to have on sale for $24.95. I went home and installed the RAM and now between the TuneUp Utilities and the 2GB RAM, my netbook that was a snail, is now a speedy rabbit. It used to take about 6-8 minutes to boot up and it would often “hang” when I was using it. Now it fully boots in around 2 ½ minutes and it doesn’t hang like it used to, and it’s a lot faster now, even when I open multiple programs.

Says 48 – Fixed outstanding Windows XP issues

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May 2 Tuesday. Tonight I fixed an outstanding computer issue that I’ve had for a couple months after a software utility program altered some files that I couldn’t restore. I’ve been getting an error message every time I start my computer where one of my programs “Dragon Naturally Speaking” that stopped working and when I start my computer, it automatically tries to find some program that it can’t find. It continues in this loop until I finally have to use task manager to shut the program down. I was seriously considering doing a complete OS install, as I couldn’t even use the REPAIR function in my Windows XP install disc as the system also affected its running.

Today I copied down the exact message, “Could not access network location %ALLUSERSPROFILE% Desktop,” and then did an Internet search to see what the problem was as I couldn’t install or even remove programs as this glitch was also affecting that aspect of my computer. I found a website by Microsoft http://support.microsoft.com/kb/886549 that says the problem is an ERROR 1606. I was apprehensive in doing any Windows directory registry changes, but the “how to” procedure was well worded and the images helped a lot. I went through the procedure of deleting corrupted entries and adding the proper or missing registry files and entries into my Windows software. I had two issues that I fixed and to my pleasant surprise when I re-booted the computer everything worked like new.

Says 47 – Working on finishing editing Book2

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May 01 I’ve been working on editing Book 2 and I’m now up to chapter 19 and 144 pages (8.5×11 pages) I’m trying to put a push on it as I plan to be leaving Regina to head back to Ontario in the early part of June. Before I do, I also plan to take a short trip up to Edmonton, Alberta, then maybe head up to the Yukon just to have a look at the countryside and say that I’ve been there done that. From there I plan to head down to Vancouver and then take the fairy over to Vancouver Island and take a short tour of the Island before beginning my trip back to Regina. Once I’m back in Regina, I’ll pack up all my stuff and then make my way back to Ontario. I plan to drop in to a couple of friends before I make my way back to Woodstock, or area, where I plan to rent a room. Where I’ll go from there, I don’t know.

Says 46 – Oxygen sensor issues with my car

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May 2 Tuesday Last Friday, my mother had been over for a visit and I drove her home. When I left her apartment building, I drove over a speed bump and my 1999 Toyota Tercel hit bottom. A of couple blocks later, I noticed my engine light was on, and my first thought was that something jiggled loose when I hit the bump, even though I didn’t hit it very hard. When I got home, I called the local Toyota dealer, Taylor Motor Sales in Regina, Sask. and made arrangements to take it in on Monday.

I took it in on Monday morning and told them the story of when the light came on. They checked it out and told me that an oxygen sensor was faulty and that they would have to order it. While he told me that, he also presented me with an invoice for $137.50.

I asked the service rep, “Did he check to see if it was a loose connection.”
He said, “No, that they would check it when they put a new one in and that they had to order one.”
I asked, “How does the mechanic know if it’s not just a loose wire and not a faulty sensor if he never physically checked it? I told you I went over a bump and the engine light came on shortly after that.”
His reply was, “If it’s just a loose wire, he’ll see it when he replaces the oxygen sensor.”

I got off my chair and pointing to the invoice he had just given me, and with a sarcastic tone to my voice, I asked. “Why would I pay $556.60 for an oxygen sensor, plus labor, plus taxes, for a part that I don’t need, if the problem is just a loose wire. And that’s not counting the $137.50 that you’re charging me today for this report. I’ve had an oxygen sensor replaced by a Toyota dealer before and it was just over $200.00 in total. This is ridiculous.”

Anyway, we got into a little argument and I tossed my debit card on his desk. As he was processing it, I exclaimed in a voice that was loud enough so that all five of the service reps and their customers would hear, as well as others in the open area, that I would never come back for service and neither would I recommend anyone else to do so. He then tossed the card back at me in an act of defiance and I caught it before it slid off the desk. I asked him why he was angry; he wasn’t the one that was being gouged? He didn’t say anything, but glared at me.

The next day I went to see my sister’s mechanic and arranged for them to do the work. He quoted me $210.00, parts, labor and taxes. I also decided to call Toyota Canada and let them know that I was not happy with their dealer. I gave them all the details, including invoice number, service representative, etc.. That’s just bullshit, and as long as car dealers that can get away with gouging, they will.

Says 45 – Doubles and doppelganger

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April 29 Sunday 3:30 AM I awoke from a dream thinking of doubles, of seeing identical twins and also of seeing myself in a mirror. I was going through all the different scenarios of doubles and reflections and then remembered my experience with my doppelganger  when I was working in cable TV years ago. I was working as a service/maintenance man but also had a part time job with the same company as a sales rep at night. I was in the midst of a sale pitch to a potential customer that I knew couldn’t afford cable TV and didn’t really want it, but I wasn’t interested in what he told me and what he wanted, I was more interested in making my commission on the sale.

I almost had him talked into signing up, when out of the corner of my eye, in my peripheral vision, I saw myself leaning against the hallway wall looking at me. He was about 10 feet (3 meters) away from me, and I not only saw this identical image of myself, but I was also aware of what this other me was thinking as I was also in his body looking at me. I was consciously flipping back and forth between being in my Body and in his Body.

One part of me was trying to close a sales pitch while observing this other part of me that was looking at me and wondering how far I would go to make a dollar, if I was willing to sell my Soul to make a buck. I was aware of what I was thinking and seeing, and then in the next instant, my consciousness was in this doppelganger and aware that he was thinking of me and looking at me. Seeing the me that was making the sales pitch to a potential Cable TV customer was unnerving to say the least. It was like this doppelganger was the good side of me, while the me that was trying to close the sale was evil and would do anything for a dollar, even if I had to over-power others to get them to do what I wanted. When I decided to shift my gaze to look directly at this doppelganger self, he disappeared.

When I turned back to talk to the customer, he looked concerned and asked me if I was having a heart attack, or had seem a ghost as I looked white and pale. I didn’t tell him what happened, but I told him that he was right, that he didn’t need Cable TV and left it at that and called it a night. That was also the end to my part-time sales job as I didn’t feel that selling my Soul was worth the few dollars I made selling Cable TV. I had never experienced anything like that before or since.

Says 44 – MacBook now working

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April 28 Saturday ever since my MacBook bit the dust  Says 42 I’ve kept going back to it to see if it would work. I had a couple of email inquiries about the Macbook that I had posted for sale on Kijiji and today a guy wrote me again, asking me what the model number was. In looking for the number, I decided to give it one more try. I had previously removed the RAM, hard drive and battery, so after re-installing them, I flipped the laptop over, open the cover, pressed the power button,  pressed the keys to reset the PRAM, and voilà…. it sprang to life. I turned it off and on and it was still working. I waited for a half an hour and then turned it on again and it still worked. I then ran a system check and there were no problems. I also ran a hard drive check and that was fine too. I don’t know what’s going on, but I’m happy that I have my MacBook back. I wrote the guy back saying that I was no longer selling my Macbook as it was now working.

Says 43 – Dream of a weird implant

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April 24 11:10 AM I had a dream that my right arm was itchy and I thought I had a mosquito bite or a small pimple on my forearm. When I looked closer I could see what looked like a miniature computer plug about the size of a sesame seed with what looked like a small electrical connector plug in it. I scratched at it and I could feel something solid with my fingernail. As I continue to scratch I was able to catch hold of one end and began to lift it out of my skin like picking at a scab. As I did the whole thing came loose and it looked like it had fine hair like wires coming out the bottom. There was no pain or bleeding as I removed it.

Now comes the real freaky part. Once I took it out of my skin, it began to grow to about the size of a small shoebox. It was made of a floppy translucent material that had all kinds of multi-color glowing electronics inside. The fine wires had also grown to be about the size of small computer cables and wires and the ends were glowing with different colored lights. I felt that this was the actual size of the unit but that whoever had implanted it in me, also had the technology to shrink it hundreds of times. I woke up thinking that they were using it to gather information and control me.

Says 42 – MacBook issues

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A couple of months ago I bought some used laptop computer RAM from a guy on the internet through Kijiji. Last night I installed a 1GB and 2BG RAM module into my MacBook. I pressed the power button and it didn’t turn on. I checked to see that it was installed properly and tried again, it still didn’t work. Thinking that the RAM was faulty, I then reinstalled the old RAM and tried again. It still wouldn’t turn on. I went back and forth a half a dozen times and still nothing. My MacBook was dead. I was angry and at a loss for words as I just screwed my MacBook that was working fine.

I never turned the MacBook on before I installed the RAM to see if it was working, but I had just used it a couple of days ago, and I even charged up the battery so I had no reason to think there was a problem. So now I’ll have to take it to a computer shop to see what happened. Fuck! It was working great with the 2GB RAM it had, so why did I need to force it to 3 GB, just to max out the specs.

11:30 AM, I called a local computer repair shop and talked to a tech that told me that the problem might be that I needed to reset the computer PRAM settings to accommodate the new RAM. He suggested that I install the old RAM and then reset the PRAM and see if that worked, and he told me how to do it. I tried several times, but it didn’t work. Frustrated, I packed it up and took it down to the shop where he had a look at it and said that it looked like my logic board was toasted and that it would cost close to $1,000.00 to fix it, and that it wasn’t worth it. So now my Macbook that was working great, is basically a pile of junk and only good for parts. I took it home and during the next couple of days I tried different things to see if it would boot up, but nothing worked. Finally I decided to post it on Kijiji and sell it for parts.

I’m feeling at a loss, frustrated and angry in that my wanting the computer to be bigger, better and faster, caused me to turn it into a pile of junk. instead of just accepting it as it was, I destroyed it.

Dah! I just realized that’s also what I’ve been doing to my Body. Ever since I was young, I wanted to be bigger, faster and better. I was/am not happy with the way my Body is as I have judgments and expectations on it. I’m comparing myself to others that I think are better than me. Ahhhh! This also goes back to lost hopes dreams and desires and that I never did the things I wanted in my youth, and now that I’m older, my Body isn’t able to do that, and so I feel cheated and robbed. It’s my Mind that wants my Body to be this way or that way, to do this or that. It’s my Mind that is always nudging and pushing my Body to do more, and then when it does more, my Mind wants even more, as it’s never satisfied. Each time the Body digs deeper to do more, it kills itself little by little in the process, and is able to do even less that it did before.

It’s just like I’m thinking of getting another vehicle that’s bigger and better than the Toyota tercel that I’m now driving as I’m not happy with it. Fuck! This is insane. What’s with this insane drive for more, better, faster?

Says 41 – Warm and cold blooded (internal fire or the sun for life)

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April 10 I watched a TV program this morning about python hunters in Florida. They came upon a python that was partly eaten and when they went to pick it up, it moved, it was still alive. At first they couldn’t figure out what was going on but when they began to examine the injury they determined that it was the result of birds that had pecked at it. They then noticed several vultures in nearby trees and they put two and two together and determined that the snake had been caught out in the open when the weather had turned cooler and it couldn’t get to shelter. That was when the vultures decided to make a meal of it as the python was too cold and too slow to defend itself. They had dragged the snake into the sunlight to examine its wounds and within a few minutes, the heat of the sun revived the snake and gave it the energy to try to get away.

I know that reptiles, fish and insects are cold blooded animals and don’t have an internal source of heat (fire) and so they need the sun to warm their blood and give them the ability to move, to animate life.

I feel that in humans and most other mammals that are warm blooded, that this is where Heart and the blood come in as that’s where the fire of life comes from. Heat is transferred by the blood to all parts of the Body and keep our core temperature and vital organs at a near constant rate of 98.6 degreed F (37degrees C). If we are sick and bacteria and viruses are attacking our Body, then it is our blood that tries to fight off the invaders, but the battle also throws off our Bodies ability to maintain its proper temperature as the glands regulating our bodies temperature are also affected by the invaders.

The hypothalamus is located in the brain next to the pineal and pituitary gland and is said to control our bodies temperature. So while the hypothalamus is the thermostat, it’s not the furnace that produces the heat. The hypothalamus is also a part of our endocrine system. Another gland that is also part of this system is the thymus gland that sits just above our heart. While the thymus also fights disease, it’s also known in ancient times as the life force.

I’m wondering if this gland is somehow our mini furnace? Something has to be generating this heat and it’s not just the by product of our Body digesting food, as people that haven’t eaten for days still maintain their body heat. The other thing is that if the digesting of food was responsible for creating body heat, then we should be hotter after a meal as we have more food to put in the fire. Something is going on that science hasn’t picked up on, or they have and are keeping it a secret… So the big question is, what is producing our internal fire or heat source to maintain life?

Says 40 – Lost hopes, dreams, desires and innocence

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2012 April 9 Lost hopes, dreams and desires are directly related to experiences where you had the opportunity to fulfill those dreams and desires, but you were either denied having the experience, or you denied it yourself. As much as you now hope and long for another opportunity to re-live the experience as you would like to do things differently, it’s also futile, as that moment has passed and things have changed. It’s is impossible to even pretend and deny that the original experience never happened. Even knowing that you have a second chance, doesn’t make it the original experience, as you already have that imprint, program and belief, that it is a lost hope, dream and desire, that was put in place from the original denied experience.

With that realization comes the feelings of heartbreak, as well as anger and rage at yourself for being held back, or for holding yourself back. While these feelings and emotions are quick to surface, what is harder to reach and also the most important is your denied terror, and why you felt your terror was correct at that time, in denying the experience.

What brought this topic up was my remembering a few experiences in my early adolescence. While I was curious about girls and wanted to talk with them and be friends, I was also afraid that I was bad or that others would think that I was bad. The reason behind those thoughts was due in part to my religious upbringing and my mother, and secondly was the result of being bullied and not wanting to say or do anything that would give others a reason to attack me. This was my terror that I denied, and as such, I denied any experiences where I had the desire to do so.
Now, decades later, I wonder what would have happened if? If I had done that, if I had said that, and hundreds of other if’s. Guilt and shame were also involved in keeping me from the experiences I was curious about and desired. This is also associated with lost innocence, innocence that I denied, and now, lost youth, as I’m now decades older, and I can’t relive my youth….or at least, that is my present belief.

It’s interesting that I added that as an afterthought as that thought came from nowhere. So maybe there is a way to heal all this and to reclaim lost innocence and fulfill my lost hopes, dreams and desires.

As I’m writing this, I’m feeling over whelmed at all that I have lost. I have very few memories of my childhood, adolescence, teen and even adult life. Not like some people I know that can remember minute details and even the exact date. What I do remember mostly are things associated with lost hopes, dreams and desires. I’m realizing that I was either living in the past, heartbroken and angry over what I had experienced, or I was in terror of what was awaiting me in the future. As such, I had very little of my conscious presence fully in the present moment.

Says 39 – Realization that love is polarized

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2012 April 08 Sunday, I have had the experience and understanding of what conditional and Unconditional love was for a few years now. Post 866 Insight into Conditional and Unconditional love That love has extremes that move from the darkest feelings of psychopathic loathing, hatred and cold indifference, all the way to conditional love in a state of mindless bliss, and then to Unconditional love where there are no attachments, conditions, judgments or denials. From being negative, domineering and controlling, to being positive, open and free. While I knew all this, what I realized today was that love was polarized, and I never thought of it that way before.

Polarity is the expanding principals or forces of the same essence or thing, and moving in opposite directions, away from each other. Hot-cold, dark-light, left-right, forward-reverse, large – small, and the list goes on and on. To an observer, polarity has no real meaning, as it is merely a mental concept as you would not know what hot or cold was by looking at it, unless you had some personal experience. It’s only when you experience it from a subjective state, and sense and feel the experience that you begin to understand the various attributes of that essence.

I feel there is more to it as I feel that love is also associated with life and death, from essence that desires life, to essence that desires unconsciousness and death, and everything in between. Everything is energy and is connected with love, which is life. It really doesn’t matter where anyone is on the grand scale of things as they are in their right place…………………………………….

Ahhhhh… As I wrote that last line I felt that is not the truth or we wouldn’t be in the mess that we are in. That is what this shift that is coming is all about, moving everyone and everything to its right place so that it will like what it feels. That there will no longer be the mixing together of the different essences as that is what has created the conflict in creation. While polarity provides infinite possibilities with which to experience manifestation, it is only when these polarities are intertwined or over lapping that duality is created, which brings us to the nature of good and evil.

Hummm……   This is all beginning to make sense to me in a new way.

Says 38 – Quit two Facebook groups

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2012 April 05, Well today I officially removed myself from two facebook groups that I have been in for a few years. They were the Right Use of Will, (RUOW) group and Spirit group. I had unsubscribed from them before to take a breather, but now I’ve make a clean cut, which included taking back any of my power and essence that I gave them or that they took from me, as well as giving back any power and essence that I took from them or they gave to me..

The group was originally an “open” group, meaning that anyone could join, but when the founder stepped down, new people took over and the group was changed to a “closed” group, meaning admittance by invitation only. Since then the place has been getting darker and darker, and unless you were in agreement and kowtowed with those that had a like minded following, you were either attacked or ostracized if you disagreed with them. While there are a few people there that I felt have intent to heal, that unfortunately is not the common consensus of the group. As such, I felt that it was no longer my right place, and for that reason, I left.

It’s too bad that the name of the group is Right Use of Will, as I feel what is happening there now is totally the opposite of what RUOW represents. I’ve never really focused on promoting my facebook group, “The Heart Centre,“ as I felt the others were already established and seemed to be what I was also trying to create, but now, I don’t know, I’ll just play it by ear and see what happens.

Says 37 – The Amero – It’s getting closer

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Canada, USA, and Mexico Meeting

The “Three Amigos.” Although there were some semi harsh words exchanged, it’s all media hype, like the WWF, as off stage, they are all bosom buddies.

It was almost a year ago that the unholy triad had a meeting. You can read about it on my old Opera Blog.. Post 800 The Amero – Something evil this way comes..

The Amero (Standard North American currency) is also tied in to a super highway that would link Mexico an Canada though the USA..

Bush Administration Quietly Plans NAFTA Super Highway

Says 36 – PENTAGON BRIEFING ON REMOVING “The God Gene”

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The video is about vaccinating people with a respiratory flu like virus that will attack certain parts of the brain in people that have strong emotional expression. The virus will dramatically suppress or eliminate any emotional based religious fundamentalism tendencies. The proposal has been to develop the virus with the prime intent of specifically targeting Islamic fundamentalists, with the goal of turning so-called Middle East fanatics into normal people..

Says 35 – How I abuse my Body…. and Body talks to me.

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2012 March 30 6:50 am I was just thinking of how I do all the things that I THINK are helping my Body, but that I’m actually doing the REVERSE. I’m denying what I don’t like, what I don’t want to accept that my Body is showing me, and how I look to outside things to make my Body either feel good, or look better.

What I need to do, is what the message said, to listen to my Body. If it’s an ache, pain or illness, I need to listen and feel what my Body is holding and work on releasing that unloving denied energy that is creating the imbalance.

If I don’t like what I see with my Body, gray hair, saggy skin, wrinkles, and a lack of strength and vitality etc, then instead of trying to force the body to exercise or use external products to try to reverse the aging process, I need to do the opposite. And again, I need to listen to my Body and let it tell me what I needs to do and to help it rejuvenate itself by finding what it is holding and then releasing the programs and beliefs and the denied energy that it has been holding for years.

2012 April 01 This morning, as I was getting out of bed , I was thinking of what I was going to have for breakfast. I nonchalantly asked my Body what it would like and to my surprise, I distinctly heard a voice in my head, say, “I’d like some porridge this morning.”
I asked, “With strawberries and Blueberries?”
I heard my Body reply, “No strawberries, just blueberries as the strawberries are not healthy.”
I sat on my bed for a few moments, taking in all that just happened. I got up feeling a happiness and lightness in my Body that I haven’t felt since I was a child. It brought tears to my eyes.

 

Says 34 – Letting go of the Old world and creating a new World

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2012 March 30 6:40 am I awoke and was thinking of all the things that are wrong in this world and I began to write a list.

Corrupt government, federal, provincial, and municipal
Religious beliefs and conflict
The wars and military spending
Pharmaceutical drugs and medical care
High gas, food, electrical and housing prices
High CATV, satellite, telephone, cell phone and internet prices
GMO foods and animals
Polluted land, water and air
Chemtrails and government cover-up
Big brother watching you
And the list goes on and on.

I then though, this is way too much to try to fix and that the only way we are going to change things is to let go of it and let it self destruct and then we’ll build a brand new world to rise out of the ashes like the fabled Phoenix. By self-destruct, I don’t mean that the World (Earth) should be destroyed, but that the SYSTEMS that are presently in a position of power be destroyed. When they are gone, along with those that support that system; those that remain can then begin the process of creating a New World with a new blue print of how reality can be when denials are ended.

Says 33 – Message on Clearing illness and aging from the Body.

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2012 March 30 2:30 am, Before I went to bed I was read a few pages in the “Right Use of Will” RUOW (Page 2) on clearing illness and habits. When I went to bed, I had been thinking of how to heal my Body and later I awoke hearing the following message. I reached now and picked up my journal that I have between my night table and my bed , turned the light on and began to write the following message.

Say this aloud and make it your intent.

Body, I am here to help you heal yourself. What is it that you desire me to help you come into full Being? I will listen to your wants, needs, and desires and will do my best to fulfill them? I know that I have not listened to you in the past and have gotten you to do what I wanted and thought was the right thing. I know you are also holding a lot of the Wills denied energy and I am ready to help you release it and to help you and the Will heal and come into full consciousness, glory and power. This is my intent, This is my intent with Body, Will and Heart. I ask that you teach me, to help me listen to you, and to know that it is your Will, your true desire. It is time to end this battle, this struggle, as it is life that we all desire and so to achieve that, we all need to let go of all that does not serve our highest purpose and good.

We sense your doubt and fear, and like your brothers comment to Peter “O thou of little faith, wherefore didst thou doubt,” we want to add, that what he did not say was that,” You know that all things are possible, you have only to imagine them and they will manifest for your experience.”

I ask Father, Mother and the Company of Heaven to help me, help us bring Heaven to Earth and to live life as we have never know it. Amen.

Says 32 – Faith and your Power

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2012 March 30 A few days ago, I uploaded a bunch of religious and Spiritual pictures to my facebook account. Gathering from the comments I was getting, people were being activated and confused between the words “faith” and “religion,” as religious doctrine uses the words interchangeably. I feel that faith and religion (religious beliefs) are not one and the same, as even the Bible sets them apart. To clarify this issue, today I uploaded three pictures where I had added text containing some Biblical scripture that Jesus said that defined the meaning of Faith.

Says 31 – My ear issue clearing up, but now my sister has ear problems

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2012 March 28 My hearing is almost back to normal. It’s taken quite a while for the internal sounds and my heartbeat to finally subside. I still have some problems with some audio frequencies and voices but that is also improving.

My sister had the flu last week and had also been complaining about a sore ear. Well she took off early at work when she realized that things in the office just weren’t quiet, but that she had lost some healing and went to see her doctor. After some tests, he determined that her tight eardrum had been perforated and that she had a middle and inner ear infection, for which he gave her a prescription for anti0biotics. What makes matters worse is that she had lost most of her hearing in her left ear in early adolescence, so now she is really at a loss. She said it’s not too bad as over the years she has had a lot of ear infections and has learned to lip read