Category Archives: Personal

Says 423 – Journeys from the Heart Centre (eBook 1 Free)

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Journeys from the Heart Centre – Meditation as a tool for healing and Self-empowerment

My first book is free in the following eBook formats: PDF, ePub and Kindle Mobi.

You can either download it from any internet eBook provider or from my website, Shenreed.com

 

 

Table of Contents
• Introduction
• Chapter 1 – Wellness and Self-empowerment Tools
• Chapter 2 – Breath, Grounding, Relaxing, and Centering
• Chapter 3 – Denial Based Meditation
• Chapter 4 – Non-Denial Based Meditation
• Chapter 5 – Visualization Journeys
• Chapter 6 – Animal Guides and Totems
• Chapter 7 – Clearing your Astral Attachments
• Chapter 8 – Exploring Past Lives
• Chapter 9 – Life Guides and Higher Self
• Chapter 10 – Conscious Channeling
• Chapter 11 – Feeling, Healing and Understanding Emotions
• Chapter 12 – Multi-dimensional Journeys
• Chapter 13 – Other Journeys
• Conclusion
• About the Author
• Appendix

Says 399 – Humanity going in Circles

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I channeled this poem a few years back. It really feels appropriate now, given the covid-19 virus and the global situation resulting in a financial and a personal liberty crisis. How governments, the medical establishments and the media all over the world are using the covid-19 virus as a distraction, a diversion to obtain their true intent. They’re feeding society part-truths and instilling fear and panic in most of the population with the continued onslaught of propaganda, to the point that most people are willing to give up their freedom on the promise that the government “authorities” and medical “experts’ know best and will take care of them.

poem is taken from my second book.

Going in Circles

Circling the tree
running round and around.
Looking for answers
That can’t be found.

Bewildered and confused
they toil and they strife.
Trying to find
the meaning of life.

While silently sitting
rubbing hands in glee.
Is the evil bushwhacker
hiding up in the tree.

Watching his subjects
beat a path in the ground.
Feeding them part truths
calling them valid and sound.

And so they do run
all day and all night.
Not even aware
of their sorry-full plight.

Joined in commonality
for this it is true.
As are the animals
caged in a zoo.

Afraid to challenge
or unable to think.
In circles they’ll go
until they all sink.

And ponder how life
has passed them all by.
Now comes to late
a tear in their eye.

Channeled by – John Rieger/Shenreed – 2002 Jan. 19

Says 396 – CoronaVirus and world control

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The Virus is a distraction from the main agenda of the N.W.O. which is far deadlier than the virus could ever be. It’s a test to see if the dumbed down sheeple are ready to be totally controlled and to obey their masters. And by the looks of things, they are. I’ve mentioned “the Beast” a few times and the 10 heads or sectors that it controls..

Says 394 – Toxic Muscle Knots.

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All I can say is WOW… To make a long story short, I’ve been exploring different “experimental” approaches to healing the injuries I sustained in a car accident five years ago. They are related to myofascial muscles knots, slipped and degenerated disc and vertebrae that have not only caused chronic and acute pain, but also limited my flexibility, range of motion and strength. The professional medical diagnosis was that I had Fibromyalgia of an unknown origin and an unknown cure and suggested pain killer and anti-inflammatory drugs that I’m allergic to.
 
Recently, after a few months of Massage and Chiropractic adjustments and my own “experimental” approach, I again worked on my knotted muscles. The past few weeks, I’ve noticed that after a serious session of working on my knotted muscles, my urine was discoloured and a dark yellowish brown, BUT, not only that, it had a toxic chemical smell to it AND the smell of an exterior flesh wound that had gone septic.
 
I checked the internet and my first link was the one I’m posting.. https://www.painscience.com/articles/toxic-trigger-points.php
 
So now I know I’m on the right track as I’ve been gradually feeling better as I go.. There is more to it, a lot more… but that will be in my next book. 🙂

After a few months of Massage and Chiropractic adjustments and my own “experimental” approach, I again worked on my knotted muscles. The past few weeks, I’ve noticed that after a serious session of working on my knotted muscles,  my urine was discoloured and a dark yellowish brown, BUT, not only that, it had a toxic chemical smell to it AND the smell of an exterior flesh wound that had gone septic.

I checked the internet and my first link was on TOXIC MUSCLE KNOTS 

So now I know I’m on the right track as I’ve been gradually feeling better as I go..  There is more to it, a lot more… but that will be in my next book.  🙂

Says 393 – I’ve been down the rabbit hole and now coming back.

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CorruptionI haven’t posted for a while as I’ve been busy trying to restore my health and also in dealing with doctors, insurance companies and lawyers. I’m dealing with new experiences where I don’t know what I don’t know, and I’m like a novice tennis player playing against a trained professional that pretend they are just a beginner like me.

It’s been nearly five years since the car accident and a lot has happened. What I’ve been having to deal with are the corrupt insurance companies, lawyers, doctors, and all the minions (order followers) that are not interested in the facts and truth, but in manipulating the facts to suit their version of the truth. Lying, omitting, avoiding and denying are the “professional” tools they use to win at any cost. There is next to no morality or conscience in their actions and so to me, I don’t know how to compete with those lack of ethics and humanity. I feel trapped as I’m forced to play on their turf, with their rules that they constantly change.

Being on unfamiliar turf was daunting, but I could hold my own when contact was in a written form like an email or snail mail, as I could see and feel what they were saying and had time to respond to any bullshit. Where I had issues was in verbal communication like a telephone call or in one-on-one discussions. When I’d question them on their BS, they would lie and deny or change the subject, so I couldn’t pin them down to deal with the truth of what they said like I could in a written form. I was like a fish out of water in dealing with them as no matter what facts I presented, they deny, lie or avoid answering direct questions. It’s been frustrating to say the least, but it’s now coming to a close and I can get back to having a life, free at least of having to deal with their bullshit. On the positive side, the past five years has been an eye-opener as I’ve gotten to experience how “they” operate and realizing that they aren’t going to change.

Says 354 – Airing my laundry in public. V-04

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Since this video is associated with the previous one, I thought I’d post both the same day. I just finished hanging out my laundry on the clothes line in the back yard. It’s a nice mainly sunny day, and the temperature is supposed to go up to around 30C or 87F.

Says 353 – Letting you in on my personal life V-03

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Just a little video to let you in on my personal life. This happens to be about the little Laundromat I go to. It’s convenient, clean and also not as expensive as other ones. Even though the machines are older, they still work.

If you’re wondering what happened to V-02, I haven’t posted it yet as it is a video of the examination room I was in and my comments on how UNCLEAN it was.

Says 352 – Bitten by a dog V-01

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I went out today to see about buying some computer items and couldn’t find the house (it was in the country) When I went to ask direction at a house with a car in driveway. I ran the door bell twice and a few seconds after the second ring, I heard dogs barking and then saw them round the corner barking a growling at me. One was a long hair cross breed and the other a German Shepherd. It was the Shepherd that was aggressive and when he went for my bare leg, (wearing shorts) I put my hand down to protect my leg and he bit me. It wasn’t a real bite as he never bit the palm of my hand but he tore a triangle piece of skin on the back of my hand about a inch long. It was probably a combination of his bite, and my hand going down that did the damage

The other dog was just barking and wagging his tail now so I knew he was safe, and as I reached out and petted him, the Shepherd backed off a bit. I slowly made it back to my vehicle all the while, watching the Shepherd.. I managed to get in my vehicle and got a bandage to stop the bleeding.

I drove across the highway, got directions from a woman and found the right house but I didn’t buy what he was selling. When I left the house, and was driving back to the main highway, I noticed a car pull into the house with the dogs. Turns out it was the owners and I told them what happened and showed them my wound. They were apologetic, kind of, at least the husband was. I told them they should not let their dogs run loose if they are aggressive like that. Today it was me, but what if it was a child.

I drove back to Woodstock and went to the emergency and after four hours, the doc came in and said he couldn’t stitch the wound which I figured would take 4-5 stitches, and all he did was clean up the wound, pull the skin back in place and put 5 steri-strips across the wound.. I could have done that.. Dah!

PS: This is my first selfie type video I have ever made.

Says 326 – System ruled by threat and intimidation

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Comment by Shenreed

When you really think about it, our society and the various systems that we live under are run by psychopaths that use threats and intimidation to get us to comply and obey their rules, regulations. You can’t challenge, disobey, and most certainly, you can’t show any disrespect for their authority. If you do, you will be marked and put on notice with even more threats and intimating tactics.

The system isn’t ruled by fear; it’s fueled and runs on the fear energy that is denied expression. They feed off the energy (our energy) that we deny when we are triggered into our fears. The more we face our fears and heal them, the more fearless we become and the more they try to control the masses and those that they feel will upset their apple cart, the more their power is being diminished. The only reason they feel more rules and controls are needed is because the present ones don’t seem to be doing the job.

Says 319 – Work to make a living – or…

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We have been taught that we must work to earn (make) a living. That we must sacrifice our energy and time doing what we really don’t want to do, to earn MONEY so that when we get some time off work, we can “maybe”, enjoy a little of what we really desire to do. This is, as I like to say, backasswards.

Says 318 – Cognitive Dissonance and Misinformation

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The image on the left is the current meme definition of cognitive dissonance that is flooding the internet. The original definition of cognitive dissonance, is when you know the truth, but have been “persuaded” to change your mind and accept and promote the lie as the truth. The most common examples can be found in politics and religion. I searched the net to find the old video where this term came from but could not find it, instead, there were a bunch of BS ones like this Meme. The original meaning, based on the 1950’s video, is what I shared on the right side.

However, I did post it on my blog a while back and I feel it important to post it again. Here is the link to the ORIGINAL psychotically experiments carried out back in the 50’s . https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=korGK0yGIDo

This video from the mid 1950’s explains, by example, what cognitive dissonance is and HOW it is created… As you can see, this modern definition twists that into something entirely different. The meaning of cognitive dissonance has now been changed, just like the word psychopath and been changed to sociopath. This change in meaning and the flooding of the internet with false and misleading videos and information is something that I’ve been noticing the past few years. Don’t be fooled by word or definition changes. Bullshit is still bullshit, even if they call it a mud pie or chocolate pudding.

Says 315 – Authority – But it’s illegal

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I‘ve known for years that there is bullshit going on in Society, but until it smacks you in the face PERSONALLY it seems unreal and distant, like a story you heard others repeat. The Insurance companies, doctors, medical experts, government, police, lawyers, etc., that I‘ve had to recently deal with, have really hit this issue home. How CORRUPT the SYSTEM really is and how much denial is present in everyday interactions with these Denial Spirits or love Spirits in denial.
They are everywhere and the people you TRUST, that you have been told and believe they are there for you – AREN’T. They are there for themselves, either with greed to get as much power and gelt as they can, or they are just following orders and doing their job to get money to survive. Either way, they aren’t being honest and real and are just putting on an ACT that may have some part-truths, but only enough to get you to trust THEM and doubt yourself, and in that they have power over you. Of course, now I’m speaking up and calling bullshit when I see and smell it, and guess what happens? NOTHING! They either don’t comment or reply, or they change the subject. This latest exchange is with the person that represents me as a so-called lawyer and legal advisor. I won’t say too much as those that know, know what I mean, and those that don’t. – well – keep on guessing. LOL

Says 305 – The “Beast”

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The New World Order

I modified this image and added the text a few years ago as part of my attempt to try to put some of the pieces of the puzzle together. Don’t get me wrong in quoting the bible, as I’m not religious by any means, it’s just a couple of verses that stuck with me.

The reason I’m posting this now is that almost three years ago, I had a car accident, where a woman ran a red light and I broadsided her. My SUV was totaled. I didn’t have any broken bones, but suffered hearing loss, TMJ, whiplash, soft tissue damage and lower back injuries.

Anyway, I got a letter from my lawyer, notifying me of a “Discovery” meeting regarding the tort claim. He submitted a couple pages of what to expect at this meeting. The process starts with a swearing in to tell the truth, and that activated my issues with so-called “authority,” figures that have immunity, privilege, and entitlement, and are not governed by the same rules that the rest of us are supposed to follow and OBEY.

It brought up all that is wrong with this world; the denial spirits that run it and all those Order Followers who are “just doing their job” that are part of the system. When I look at all those involved in the system, (the BEAST) it’s no wonder that I feel overwhelmed and that the Earth is in the shape it’s in.

Why this is activating me is because it will be me against the system. By that, I mean that it will be my opportunity to heal a lot of issues including expressing my feelings and emotions, and challenging old imprints, programs and beliefs, that I know they will try to suppress and deny. Speaking my truth and “walking my talk” in the presence of those that will try every trick to manipulate and control me is terrifying. A few years ago I had the unpleasant court experience where I discovered first hand, the power of denial. Now it will be an opportunity to see if I will repeat, or, witness the power of love.

Says 295 – Woodstock Ontario Hyundai Service Sucks…

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Hyundai Service in Woodstock Ontario gets two thumbs down..

Aaaaaaggggghhhhhhh!   🙁

I told you about my Santa Fe and how they can’t get diagnostics to work for a e-test… I took it in to the dealer last Monday and they said it was the computer and they order a used one. They called on Wednesday and said it was in. I took it in on Thursday at 9:00 am and after 4 hours, they said it wasn’t the computer, but a wiring problem and gave me an estimate for removing the dash for 6 hours @ $102.00/hour.  I left the car there and they drove me home. They called on Friday at 4:30 pm and said they still hadn’t found the problem. So I was without a vehicle for the weekend.

On Monday, at 4:30 pm, they called and said it was ready, that they had repaired the broken wire and were sending someone around to pick me up. She also told me  that the mechanic was now looking at the three issues I had noted. I explained that on Thursday, I told the service advisor and mechanic about the three minor electrical problems that are under the dash, that happened after I had the heater core replaced, and if they were removing the dash, to also fix those issues. I exclaimed that now that the dash is replaced, I’m not paying to have them take it apart to look for the problems they should have checked when they had the dash apart.. WTF…

When I got there, the service advisor said they had to replace the computer as it had shorted out.. I went into a rant as if that was the truth, then they would also have shorted out the new “used” computer when they installed it.. AND… A broken wire does NOT create a short circuit, it creates an open circuit, no current flowing. I knew they were bullshitting me.

In total, this “broken” wire cost me just over $900.00, that’s with her dropping $150 off the bill. but still..!!!  AND  – I’m not finished. They could have easily ordered an new connector assembly and plugged it into the computer and hidden the cable under the centre counsel.  Takes one minute to pull the panel. The whole job would have taken 15 minutes..

AND… when I went to get my vehicle, the car seats were spotted with greasy dirt spots and oily grime smudge marks in the fabric. The floor mats on the driver side looked like they walked in oil and grime and didn’t care it was dirtying both the top fiber mat. They seemed to have removed the top mat and then did the same to the original carpet.The side panel on my centre counsel were loose and screws missing.

NOT IMPRESSED>>> I wasn’t before…but this is the last time I’m going there,  Woodstock Hyundai  even if I have to drive to London or Cambridge. This is ridiculous.

 

Says 294 – Hyundai Santa Fe computer issues

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2016 Image of Santa Fe dash

After my trip out west with no vehicle issues in almost 10,000 km, I decided to get a compulsory vehicle (emissions) e-test to get a two year vehicle license renewal. The shop I went to said they couldn’t get a reading from my diagnostic plug and suggested I go to the dealer for them to check it out and do the test.

I waited a few days and then dropped into another shop and got the same problem. So now I figure I’d go to the dealer and get it checked out.

I made an appointment and after a couple of hours, they reported the same issue and said it was my computer. A new one was over $1,000.00, but they couldn’t get one so they were able to find a used one in Halifax for $160.00 but that it would take a few days to get here and that the installed cost would be around $350.00.

A few days later they called to make an appointment to get it installed and I made a note to the service advisor that I wanted the old one, as it worked fine except for the diagnostic issue. A few hours later they informed me that it wasn’t the computer, that there was something else causing the problem. She said they re-installed the old one and were looking into it. In the mean time they offered to drive me home. I told the mechanic working on the car that I had the heater core replaced at the beginning of 2016 and that I had three minor electrical issues ever since, but I didn’t think it was worth the hours required to R&R the dash. He said good to know.

They telephoned  me later saying that they would not charge me for the computer, but that the senior mechanic said the issue was behind the dash and that they needed to R&R the dash to solve the problem. They gave me a repair cost of 6 hours @ $102.00/hour for $600.00 plus tax and sent me an email to confirm the repair. I agreed and added the fact that the dash had been removed and I had three minor electrical issues after that, and since they were removing the dash anyway, they could now fix. As of Friday, Aug 18 – 3:30 pm, I’m still waiting to hear from them.

PS: UPDATE: I got a call at 4:50 pm stating that they were still working on my vehicle and that they would give me an update on Monday.

Says 287 – Photo Radar Ticket

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When I got home from my vacation, I received a surprise in the mail… a photo radar speeding ticket (101 kph in a 80 kph and $130) that I got just outside Regina back on June 30, that was issued on July 11. Of course I’m not going to pay it and I’m firing off the following letter (email) to the RCMP… Since the security classification is non-sensitive, I feel I can mention names…

Attn: Cpl. Tran Davies,

Re: File – 2017891332

Without prejudice.

This is to inform you that there is no way that I will “voluntarily” agree to this traffic ticket and the conditions it sets forth, as that violates my rights as a sovereign citizen and human being. I have no recollection of what the posted speed limit was, or the driving conditions at the TIME of the so-called traffic infraction, as I was just following the flow of traffic. If a police officer had personally stopped me, then I would be aware of the surroundings and if I was indeed speeding or not. As it stands, I have only your corporations photo radar data and the official CERTIFIED testimony of your paid employee (OLWENY, SHAWNA MARIE) that issued the ticket that I was speeding. Also, the so-called infraction was, as indicated on the black bar photo (photoshop?) was on 2017 June 30, yet the ticket was not issued until 2017 July 11. I physically received the ticket when I arrived home on 2017 July 21.

The threatening wordage and tone of this OFFENSE NOTICE has all the ear markings of an impersonal, righteous, and judgmental psychopaths that demand strict obedience and compliance to self-directed law and order without question, all the while demanding payment and other threatening action if payment is not received in a timely manner. As an out-of-province driver and visitor to the province, I suspect that I (and others) are easy prey to what I consider a money scam, as who is going to travel thousands of kilometers to challenge your robotic and impersonal machine that is incapable of answering my questions other than what (it) was programmed to print, if indeed it did print what is presented on the photo. Of course in court, (which I am unwilling to attend as that is a three day drive) you, as a paid employee of a corporation acting as an agent for another corporation, the province of Saskatchewan, and on behalf of, and representing her majesty, “the queen,” would appoint another bureaucratic human being to espouse the virtues and outstanding job that the photo radar robot is doing to protect the lives of highway workers and the safety of other motorists. As well, they would cite various rules, laws and other bureaucratic jargon to justify your (and their) corporate authority and right to rule. Since bureaucrats are not subject to the same laws and punishment as the “common folk” when it comes to truth and personal responsibility for ones words and actions, what would not be discussed is the real intent, and how much money this scam makes for the corporations.

What I’ve noticed in my travels, not only in Saskatchewan but also in Alberta and BC, was that the posted speed limit signage in construction zones was up and down like the toilet seat at a political convention. Dropping by as much as 50 kph, with no signs that there had ever been any construction in the area, and no equipment or workers to even indicate future activity. Other times, construction was visible but not active, yet speed limits would fluctuate between 110, 80, 60, 100, 50, 70, 40, or whatever the whim of the one posting them, and sometimes the signs would be only a few car lengths apart. Sometimes there was evidence that construction had occurred in the past and was now complete, but the signs had not been removed. Other times, construction speed limit signs were posted 5 to 10 kilometers before the actual construction zone, slowing down traffic for no reason. Of course, there were also instances where real flagmen/women, machinery, and workers were present.

If motorists were to adhere to the strict letter of the law and follow this idiotic speed limit pattern, they would have to panic stop to slow down to the posted limit and then accelerate at an unreasonable rate of speed to follow the next posted limit. This type of driving is not only dangerous, but is also in direct contravention to your stated directive and attributes of using photo radar to protect highway workers and the safety of other motorists. Signs should be posted, (as they once were) to allow motorists to slow down and speed up in a natural and safe manner. This blatant inconsistency sends up red flags that something is amiss and needs to be addressed, but of course, as I’m addressing bureaucrats just doing their job and following orders, I doubt anything will change.

As stated, this statement is without prejudice and just my opinion.

By: John Rieger, Agent for JOHN J RIEGER

PS: In the covering letter, it states… “If you decide to voluntarily pay the fine or you are convicted, this conviction will not appear on your drivers abstract nor will any demerit points be assessed.” Yet at the bottom (right side) of the offense notice you issue this WARNING, that (B) YOUR DRIVERS LICENSE WILL BE SUBJECT TO NON-RENEWAL OR SUSPENSION OR BOTH.

Yet another contradiction…

Says 286 – Going on a little Vacation

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I’ve decided to take a little road trip out West to see my family and be there for my mother’s 92nd birthday. It’s been five years since I’ve been out West, and in the past two and a half years (since my motor vehicle accident) all the visiting I’ve done is to see my Doctors, Physiotherapists, Chiropractors, massage, and hearing specialists.

I’d like to take my canoe and get in a little paddling in Northern Ontario, but that is still out of the question. Instead, I might do a little hiking and get back into my photography. I’m packing my camping gear and hope to get a few nights sleeping under the stars.

I know I have been lax in posting, and I have to admit, it won’t get any better in the next few weeks while I’m on the road, but I’m taking my laptop with me and will post when I get the chance. Until then…

Says 285 – Nothings changed in 25 years – SSDD

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I’m in the process of compiling the material I have for my next book, (The Empaths Dilemma) and I thought I’d join a couple of Empath and a lightworkers groups, just to get a feel for what is happening, as it’s been years since I’ve been in any group. I was “removed” from both Empath groups, but re-instated in one. I made a few posts and commented on others, but I have to say that I felt that only two or three people were at what I would call their “quickeing” stage, where I could feel the lights in their Mind and Heart flicker. The rest are still asleep, although all would disagree. Unfortunately, the ones that were open, happened to be in the group that I was deleted from without even a warning.

Sad to say, it’s really no different than what was going around 25 years ago. Light workers are still sending out love and light, and Empaths are busy grounding and protecting themselves.. and both are asking for prayers and energy. I feel that the biggest obstacles people in both groups have is –
(1) They still cling to their religious beliefs, and as such, they think they KNOW what love is, oblivious to the role that denial plays.
(2) They also cling to what they have been taught, either an alternative healing modality, or recycled “quick fix” solutions.
(3) All are afraid to stray from the herd, as they feel safe and supported.

So tonight, I silently removed myself from the groups and will focus on gathering the material for my book.

Says 281 – Neighbor angry at me.

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A couple of days ago, I was outside, on the other side of my apartment building, talking to a woman tenant, when the man that lives between us walked by. I said, ”Hi,” but he never acknowledged me, and just walking with his head down. I felt he was ticked off at me as I was sure he heard me.  We used to chat and tell jokes last fall, but over winter, I only saw him a few times on the street and we never talked. With spring coming and spending more time outside, I’d see him having a cigarette in the back yard, but when he’d see me, he’d turn and go back inside, At first I just thought he had finished and was naturally going in, but a couple of times, I called out to him but he never answered back. So this meeting today was a sure sign that something was amiss.

So the next day, when I heard him in his apartment, I went around and knocked on his door. After the third knock, he answered with a hostile,”What do you want?”

I asked, “Do you have a problem with me, as you feel you are ignoring me and angry about something?”

He angrily replied, “Do you want a problem?

I said, “Whoa, so you do have a problem with me. What’s up?”

He barked, “If you want one you can have one?”  as he postured himself to make himself look bigger than he was.

I knew there was no talking to him in his denied rage, so I turned to leave and he, snarled, “You’re the one who knocked on my door, I didn’t knock on yours. You stay on your side and I’ll stay on mine.”

I didn’t say anything as I walked around the corner and then around the building to see the landlord and his helper, that was working in the apartment of the man that had recently died.  I told them what had just happened and asked if they knew why he was angry at me. They looked surprised and said they never heard anything from him. We left it at that. What the hell is going on?

Says 280 – Activated into Shame Issues

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The other day I met a woman on Facebook that was in a group I was in. She liked my posts and comments and contacted me, and we chatted for over two hours. She’s an attractive 45 year old widow, with three grown children. She lives in the US; is an artist, musician, dancer, and was a child actor. She owns her own home and her father runs a new age church and her mother has her business.

We got talking about relationships and she made a comment that age doesn’t matter, and with  the other comments and questions, and I got the feeling that she was interested in me. As we chatted, I noticed and felt shame coming up for me. Feeling that I wasn’t good enough, not talented, not popular, not good looking, no money, no home, too old and the list goes on and on.

These shame feelings and judgments that I was experiencing now were similar to the shame I had in my childhood. On top of that, I also remembered being shamed by my mother if a girl showed interest in me. I took her shame comments as having a girlfriend was a bad thing and that I was wrong and bad. This was also associated with my religious beliefs at the time that you had to honor your father and mother and they knew what was good for you.

The next day, I spoke with her again and thanked her for activating me into my shame and childhood memories, and that I was working on it.  We chatted off and on, but we never got into any lengthy discussion.

Says 279 – More pieces of the Puzzle

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My view of reality is changing.  A few weeks ago I was chatting with a friend who does work at a hospice, and a few things she said made me question my beliefs. I’ve believed that our “Spirit” is our Mind, that originates our conscious thoughts, ideas, words, etc.. BUT… after our conversation, I felt something was “off” with that concept. That, together with working on healing the other aspects of my Being, my Body, Will (Soul) and Heart, made me think that there is more.

Another thing that has been a recent topic has been Ego that is associated with the Mind and also false Ego. So…. I’m trying to put the pieces of the puzzle together and an idea that came up is that while our Mind is connected to our Spirit, it is NOT our entire Spirit, as that is where our “Higher Self” comes in. So… What if a portion of our Higher Self manifests itself in the physical and calls itself Spirit “Mind” or as some might say EGO. BUT… when our Spirit re-incarnated, it gradually forgot who it was and its prime purpose and came to be what I call our “altered Ego,” altered by imprints, programs and beliefs and judgments. Part of our process now is to experience and re-cover our Essence that we lost in past lives, to become whole again. EGO is not bad, as some make it out to be, as it defines us as who we really are.. it’s only our “altered Ego” that does crazy shit.
Now the other parts of our Being, our Soul, (intuition, feelings and emotions) Heart and Body also have their own consciousness and “try” to communicate with the Mind that is basically the “Controller” of our physical reality. But, besides these voices, we also have other incarnate and dis-incarnate voices vying for our attention, including our HIGHER SELF.

OK…Another thing is that for a long time, I’ve had this thought/feeling that I’m here to manifest, or bring down my entire Spiritual Essence into the Earth plane, in this physical body, in the hear and now. To Spiritilize my physical Body. This however, requires unconditional love and a total connection between my Mind (Ego) and the rest of my Being and my “higher self” …

Says 272 – A reversal of thought on food.

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It’s interesting how the universe sets the stage and then slowly begins to shift your conscious awareness to what it wants to show you. A few days ago it was the banana thing and worrying about the food I eat. This morning I woke up thinking of food and how its been contaminated by GMO’s and chemical pesticides We worry if the food we buy will harm our bodies and so we take as many precautions as possible and keep informed of the lasted round of tainted food.

As I was thinking this, I suddenly had a thought that instead of worrying if a food is safe or not why not use INTENT and sound energy to remove anything that doesn’t serve our body’s highest purpose and good. This is not really new as Dr Emoto researched the effect of emotions and sounds on water and so have many other scientists.

Our bodies and the food we eat are made up of mostly water and other chemicals, and – common to all is that they are all energy, but at different frequencies. So there is this LINK between us, our human bodies, and food and water that we presently need to survive, that needs to be explored. Even plants respond to the human energy field that either helps them flourish, or shrivel and die. For that matter, the same holds true for animals. As I’m typing this the word that keeps popping into my head is LOVE… LOVE is LIFE and everything is connected by love, including its absence in varying degrees or what is commonly referred to as “conditional” love.

Says 268 – Allergic to Toxic GMO Food

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On Wednesday, May 3, I bought some red grapes from Food Basics, a local grocery store. I didn’t look closely at the packaging except to see that they were from Chile, so I thought them to be OK. Before eating any, I did my usual vinegar/water solution soak, followed by adding baking soda to the soak, and finally rinsing them off. By Wednesday evening I started having stomach issues that carried on yesterday and today. I was thinking that I might have picked up a bug as I also felt a slight headache and nausea and felt tired and this morning I was visiting the bathroom.

Today at noon, I felt like a light snack and went to the fridge and pulled out the package of grapes. I saw the PLU #4499 number and beside it, the name GESEX and thought that was an odd name for a fruit company. I then noticed, in pale red letters, the words… CRIMSOM red seedless grapes… Then it hit me, they were GMO…

I did a quick internet check and sure enough, and to my surprise, Chile has been moving away from traditional grapes to GMO… I try not to buy any fruit or vegetable from the USA, especially California, and usually pick Mexico, or another foreign country, naively thinking that they haven’t been corrupted by the GMO industry… WRONG…

Usually if a food is toxic, I get cankers on the inside of my lips, I mean in seconds. But not this time… Unless it’s something else, but the grapes are the only thing that are new in my diet. It’s a weird physical feeling and sensation that really doesn’t fit any pattern I’m familiar with. As of the time I’m posting this, I’m feeling better, but now I feel bloated. I’m just going to have some of my homemade vegetarian soup for supper and see how things go.

Says 266 – Mind (Spirit) the Unloving Master

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Taken from my Journal – April 16 Monday 9:30 am

Your Mind (Spirit) may have a thought or idea, but there is no real desire or emotion to experience it. This is because the Mind instantly brings up old imprints, programs, and beliefs that say that what was suggested is not appropriate for any number of reasons. In the same breath, false Will (Soul) that is aligned with Minds judgments has no desire to experience it, as unresolved negative emotions come up to validate the Minds judgments. Heart goes along with the Minds assessment and so there is no action, no movement of the original thought or idea that was squashed by old imprints, programs and beliefs that are in reversal to the new thought or idea.  The result is that the same old pattern is repeated as one continues on their not-so-merry-go-round; wondering why things happen as they do and hoping that things will change.

So! How does this apply to the Body? Old imprints, programs, and beliefs that the Mind has, have forced the Body (through habits) to become a slave to the Minds judgments. These are deeply ingrained in not only the Mind, but also the Will, Heart and Body. These are mostly social beliefs, that of being told what to do or not to do, what is right and wrong, good or bad, acceptable or not acceptable.  These beliefs and judgments then form the habits for the Body, which has basically been forced to override its own needs and desires and be a slave to the Minds programming.

So then, to break this old programming, I need to first, get my Mind to recognize what it is doing, and then for it to open to hear what it is that the Body wants and needs.  Hummm… What the Body wants and needs in order to heal itself is the prime objective. But, the trick here is to differentiate between what the Body really wants and needs, and what the Mind thinks the Body wants and needs based on its old habits and quick fix, feel good sensations that give the Mind the false notion that what pleases the Mind also pleases the Body. It’s just like when I was getting my Mind to listen and feel what my Will (Soul) Intuition was wanting to express, so too I need to listen to my Body to not only hear, but also feel and allow it to express what it wants and needs to. As long as my Mind (Spirit) thinks it’s right and has the answer to what my Soul, Heart and Body desire and need, it is the unloving master that is unwittingly not only forcing the other parts of our Being to die, by forcing it’s denials on them, but also itself, as there is no separation.  (9:50 am)