Category Archives: Imprint-programs-beliefs

Says 40 – Lost hopes, dreams, desires and innocence

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2012 April 9 Lost hopes, dreams and desires are directly related to experiences where you had the opportunity to fulfill those dreams and desires, but you were either denied having the experience, or you denied it yourself. As much as you now hope and long for another opportunity to re-live the experience as you would like to do things differently, it’s also futile, as that moment has passed and things have changed. It’s is impossible to even pretend and deny that the original experience never happened. Even knowing that you have a second chance, doesn’t make it the original experience, as you already have that imprint, program and belief, that it is a lost hope, dream and desire, that was put in place from the original denied experience.

With that realization comes the feelings of heartbreak, as well as anger and rage at yourself for being held back, or for holding yourself back. While these feelings and emotions are quick to surface, what is harder to reach and also the most important is your denied terror, and why you felt your terror was correct at that time, in denying the experience.

What brought this topic up was my remembering a few experiences in my early adolescence. While I was curious about girls and wanted to talk with them and be friends, I was also afraid that I was bad or that others would think that I was bad. The reason behind those thoughts was due in part to my religious upbringing and my mother, and secondly was the result of being bullied and not wanting to say or do anything that would give others a reason to attack me. This was my terror that I denied, and as such, I denied any experiences where I had the desire to do so.
Now, decades later, I wonder what would have happened if? If I had done that, if I had said that, and hundreds of other if’s. Guilt and shame were also involved in keeping me from the experiences I was curious about and desired. This is also associated with lost innocence, innocence that I denied, and now, lost youth, as I’m now decades older, and I can’t relive my youth….or at least, that is my present belief.

It’s interesting that I added that as an afterthought as that thought came from nowhere. So maybe there is a way to heal all this and to reclaim lost innocence and fulfill my lost hopes, dreams and desires.

As I’m writing this, I’m feeling over whelmed at all that I have lost. I have very few memories of my childhood, adolescence, teen and even adult life. Not like some people I know that can remember minute details and even the exact date. What I do remember mostly are things associated with lost hopes, dreams and desires. I’m realizing that I was either living in the past, heartbroken and angry over what I had experienced, or I was in terror of what was awaiting me in the future. As such, I had very little of my conscious presence fully in the present moment.

Says 34 – Letting go of the Old world and creating a new World

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2012 March 30 6:40 am I awoke and was thinking of all the things that are wrong in this world and I began to write a list.

Corrupt government, federal, provincial, and municipal
Religious beliefs and conflict
The wars and military spending
Pharmaceutical drugs and medical care
High gas, food, electrical and housing prices
High CATV, satellite, telephone, cell phone and internet prices
GMO foods and animals
Polluted land, water and air
Chemtrails and government cover-up
Big brother watching you
And the list goes on and on.

I then though, this is way too much to try to fix and that the only way we are going to change things is to let go of it and let it self destruct and then we’ll build a brand new world to rise out of the ashes like the fabled Phoenix. By self-destruct, I don’t mean that the World (Earth) should be destroyed, but that the SYSTEMS that are presently in a position of power be destroyed. When they are gone, along with those that support that system; those that remain can then begin the process of creating a New World with a new blue print of how reality can be when denials are ended.

Says 26 – The power of labels and our core “I am” beliefs

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I’m in a Facebook group where I’ve been having an exchange with a man that admits he is gay. As he defended his belief of his gender preference, I realized that he was no different than a person saying they were an alcoholic or a drug addict. While the man said, “I am gay” he totally missed the fact that he is a Spiritual Being having a physical experience which happens to be being in a sexual relationship with a man, which is labeled by society as the person being gay. Being gay is what he is experiencing; it is not what he is… BIG difference.

I also realized that any mental, emotional or physical affliction is the same as an addiction in that both carry the denied underlying causes related to their physical experiences. If people allow themselves to be identified by the LABELES that their Doctor, or society puts on them, then they will have resigned themselves to be defined by those limiting and crippling beliefs. They will unconsciously will live their lives in pain and misery until such time that they choose to let go of their label belief and decide to find the hidden cause, the unseen role of denial underpinning their experience.

Our fears are connected to our “I AM” core beliefs that limit us from being who we really are. Our fears are not bad or evil, but they have their origins rooted in real life traumatic unloving experiences were we fragmented a piece of our Essence out of our Being. While we are mentally unaware of the fragments that have been denied, we are aware of their presence by their magnetic draw to be accepted, yet we still deny them, or rather, deny dealing with the original cause that created the fragmentation and resultant programs and beliefs. It’s a double blind situation as we are unaware of what we are doing and what we need to do to resolve and heal the situation and therefore we ignorantly believe our denials as being the truth and the truth as being our denials.

The same goes for other beliefs like, I am not free, I am poor, homeless, unhappy, depressed, etc. All these are limiting “I AM” beliefs and as such, are locked into the CORE of our psyche, our BEING. Until they are cleared and released, it’s impossible to become our true “I AM” presence as these beliefs, and the denied feelings and emotions behind the experiences that led to these beliefs, are overriding our true essence and power.

Affirmations like, “I am happy, I am abundant. I am free,” etc., are just a forms of denial and role-playing that only serve to deepen the belief. As an example, simply saying “I am happy” when one is actually feeling sad is in blatant denial of our true feelings and emotions.

 

Says 13 – The Body and its five senses

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2012 Feb 17 The Bodies sensations of sight, sound, taste, touch and smell are very much like the Will, in that they can differentiate between what is pleasant and what is not pleasant, loving and unloving. This is most evident with the senses of taste, touch and smell, as the Mind has formed judgments that override the input of sight and sound, with sight being the most overridden, as in the expression, “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.” This overriding of our Will, and Body is what is learned through our experiences.

Before I wrote the above paragraph, I was thinking of my hearing problem, and how I had difficulty hearing my brother last night when he came to visit me. I thought how strange and empty my world would be without sound and the ability to hear all the sounds I presently hear. I then closed my eyes and thought of all the objects, shapes, colors that would disappear if I also lost my sight, and how helpless I would be trying to make our my around and function.

All five of our senses have special properties that allow us to experience reality in different ways, and to lose even one would have a profound effect on our lives. For me, the senses I most value, in order of importance would be sight, sound, touch, taste, and smell. I feel there are even more physical senses that we possess, it’s just that we don’t know how, or we can’t use them at the present moment. I feel they are much like how we can use technology to expand our awareness, but we would not need technology to experience them, as we would be able to have these abilities naturally.