You can’t judge a book, or a person, by their cover or outer appearance. Judgments are thought forms frozen in time, and attached to the thinker. They can either be real, based on past experience, or on an imprint, program, or belief instilled in the mind as truth.
Present day dumbed down society is a testimony to that. Most are happy being told what they can and can’t do, and will be outraged at those that oppose their beliefs and the system.
It’s not really about what is being said, but what is not being said. I could give you a list of judgments and denials, but I feel it’s important that one should become aware of the hidden language within our words. – Food for thought – or not
I find it interesting that a few of the New Agers and RUOW people I know are turning toward organized religion. I don’t mean in an exploratory way, I mean getting right into the Christian saved and born again bible thumpers, or into Hinduism, Buddhism, or Muslim religions with a gung ho attitude that they’ve finally found their community, a sense of commonality, and their calling. I feel they were searching for a common thread that would unite them with other like minded / feeling people where everyone had a so-called “positive” attitude and supported one another. A community where they would feel loved, wanted, and protected, and not alone, unwanted, or in fear of being attacked. Once your Spirit is broken and you have given in to the outer reflection that you are powerless, your mind no longer challenges or searches for answers, but blindly accepts what it is told as the truth. You become part of the flock with herd mentality.
On the other hand, I’m also witnessing some friends and family members that were “born again,” saved, church going, praying, and gospel singing Christians that have lost their “faith” in their church (aka religion) and are trying to come to terms with that. I feel these people have a better chance of healing and empowering themselves, as now they are unsure of their beliefs about what love and life are all about and are willing to question what they previously called truth.
Overall, even if you are not a devoutly religious person, (including atheists and agnostics) there is this social “religious” mindset that while it may not be obvious, has a sinister undercurrent that dictates social morals and behavior. Until one is able to let go of their religious beliefs they will be controlled by them and will also try to control others around them, thus creating conflict. They try to solve the conflict by either changing the rules or adding new and improved ones hoping that it will create peace and that things in their life will change for the better. Besides letting go of one’s religious imprints, programs and beliefs, one needs to explore and let go of, or change the social imprints and programs that are embedded in their mind that unconsciously control one’s thoughts, words and deeds. Politics, government, education, media, police and the military are but a few major players that dictate social experience and reality.
I was watching the movie “King Arthur – Legend of the Sword,” and a comment by the present king piqued my interest. I can’t remember the exact words, but they were along the lines that he thrives on another’s fear; that even though they may hate him, it feeds him energy and power. Another comment was, “You have to break his old self completely, wear him down.”
Later, I thought about the comment and the people that feed off your fears and control you and have power over you, can only do so as long as you are denying the fear that they are activating. Say you have a fear (terror) of confrontation, then they will use whatever they can to activate your fear, be it mental, emotional, physical, or any combination thereof. Anything that threatens you; that you are afraid to face or challenge, will and can over-power and control you.
The other things people use to control and over-power you is guilt and shame. They make you think, feel, and believe that your words or actions are wrong and even hurtful to the one that is trying to control you. They are using your minds twisted beliefs of what love is, what is right and wrong, along with your false emotions that are aligned with your minds beliefs to get you to re-act in the way they want you to.
In order to activate you into your denied issues and fear (terror) as a means to control and over-power you, there are four basic tactics that others use. They are the intimidator, the interrogator, the “oh poor me,” and the aloft or withdrawn approach. If one tactic doesn’t work they will try another until they wear you down and break you, and you re-act in one of three different ways according to your imprinting and programming. You either fight, (that you can’t win) run, or you just give in to their demands to stop the conflict. In doing any of these you give them your power.
Reincarnation & Karma
Before we reincarnate, we choose what parts of our Essence we want to heal and recover, and the experiences we need in order to do that. Of course all this is forgotten soon after birth, and we need to plod our way through life, pondering why things happen to us and for what reason.
Karma is an Eastern term that describes the experience of things happening in our lives that seem to be repeated, albeit in different forms, places and times. Karma is not a bad thing even though the experiences may be unpleasant and undesired, they are in fact, what we need to address and heal as part of our earthly sojourn. Once we make the connection that our experiences are directly related to our purpose, then our life begins to change. We begin to see things in a different light and ask questions like who, what, where, when, why and how. Of course for every answer you get you also get ten more questions, so the journey takes us deeper into discovering and remembering who really we are and what our purpose is.
Another way to say it is that you are giving more energy to “denying” your fears, than in facing and healing them… So the reflection (reality) you create and experience are your denials and NOT your desires. Once you have truly faced and healed your fears (shadows) at the causal level, your outer reality also changes, and what was a fear and issue, no longer is.
Saying that is easy, doing it is quite another thing as it’s something that you have NEVER done before, or you wouldn’t be having the outer reflections you do. Ending your denial of a particular fear or issue also allows you to feel what unconditional love really feels like, and not what you presently believe it is based on some religious rhetoric.
Religion and politics (government) are the two major players that control your life through the social illusion that they have the “authority” to make rules, laws, and conditions that “others” must follow. They both control your physical life, mentally, emotionally and physically. The government controls your physical activities through laws, rules, taxes, etc., while religion has rules and conditions that you must adhere to ensure that when you physically die, that you will have a happy afterlife.
You are lead to believe that you must accept their “authority” over you, to unquestionably follow their instructions and have faith that “they” know what is good for you. If you don’t follow your various governments’ rules, conditions and orders, you will be harassed, intimated, incarcerated or even put to death. If you don’t follow your religions voice of “authority,” they would have you believe that your Soul and Spirit will be dammed in the afterlife.
I was thinking that the main issue in healing that Empaths have in empowering themselves is their religious beliefs. I was going to say that the second thing is seeing and knowing what denial is, but as I thought that, I knew it also related to their religious beliefs that had to do with love and what a loving person is. As long as you belief that denial (of self expression) is love, you are, as the saying goes, “Screwed, glued and tattooed.” Even if you are an atheist or agnostic, that doesn’t mean that you don’t have any religious beliefs, it’s just that your beliefs are opposed to organized religion. You were raised in a society where people had religious beliefs, customs and traditions, and your parents, and their parents and so on. All were imprinted and programmed with beliefs of what is loving or not, moral standards, and codes of behavior, etc.
The second thing that controls you is the various forms of government and their agencies. If you are not a so-called “conspiracy theorist,” then you aren’t even aware of the blatant social denials that are in politics and government, military, media, food, medical, big business, etc., etc. If you can’t see the obvious lies, denials, and deception going on in your outer reality, it’s even harder to begin to see your own lies and denials, and how you are deceiving yourself. It’s far easier to pick up on what others are, or are not saying or doing, than it is with yourself. It’s sad to think that over 95% of the population is so brainwashed and in denial that they can’t see the obvious and blatant lies and denials in their outer reality (religion and politics) that is controlling them. The irony is that in ending ones denials, one begins to break away from both these illusions that control us, and that we call natural, a way of life, and the way things are.
I’m in the process of compiling the material I have for my next book, (The Empaths Dilemma) and I thought I’d join a couple of Empath and a lightworkers groups, just to get a feel for what is happening, as it’s been years since I’ve been in any group. I was “removed” from both Empath groups, but re-instated in one. I made a few posts and commented on others, but I have to say that I felt that only two or three people were at what I would call their “quickeing” stage, where I could feel the lights in their Mind and Heart flicker. The rest are still asleep, although all would disagree. Unfortunately, the ones that were open, happened to be in the group that I was deleted from without even a warning.
Sad to say, it’s really no different than what was going around 25 years ago. Light workers are still sending out love and light, and Empaths are busy grounding and protecting themselves.. and both are asking for prayers and energy. I feel that the biggest obstacles people in both groups have is –
(1) They still cling to their religious beliefs, and as such, they think they KNOW what love is, oblivious to the role that denial plays.
(2) They also cling to what they have been taught, either an alternative healing modality, or recycled “quick fix” solutions.
(3) All are afraid to stray from the herd, as they feel safe and supported.
So tonight, I silently removed myself from the groups and will focus on gathering the material for my book.
This meme is floating around the internet and it is hogwash, NOT that it isn’t a truth, but that it’s NOT a social truth, far from it. People are socially imprinted and programmed to label (judge) people, places and things. They give other people status and authority and then kowtow or worship them. The pope, Dalai Lama, priest, minister, the Queen, president, a politician, a movie star, singer, sports player, policeman, soldier, fireman, guard, CEO, teacher, manager, supervisor, etc, etc. These are all people that we put ahead of ourselves, that we think and say have more worth or value.
But wait – there is more! What about the labels you put on yourself. The irony is that in our brain-washed “altered” EGO state of Being, we try to be like, or at least, associate and identify ourselves with the idols we worship. I AM a Christian, I AM a Catholic, I AM a Anglican, I AM a democrat, I AM a Jennifer Lopez fan, I AM a Boston Celtics fan, I AM a patriot and support our troops, I AM Pro life, and the list goes on an on. All these I AM labels separates people and creates inner conflict, as always there will be people better or more important than you. The irony is that religion and even New Agers, put on this false bravado and rhetoric that we are all the same and equal., which is a part-truth, but what is not said, what is denied and already imprinted and programmed into our Minds is that some are more equal than others.
And now, we get to the interesting part. Because you identify yourself with another person that you think is above you; as soon as anyone says anything that appears to attack what you idolize and worship, your “altered” Ego thinks it’s a personal attack and gets it’s Belief Systems (BS) brain cells firing at anything it sees as a threat.
BUT THERE IS MORE….. Now on a more personal level, all this came about with my activation on my previous post .. and removing the labels I had placed on others and myself, is part and parcel of working on healing my shame issues
On Saturday night, I got a PM from the person in the group that I had spoken to previously. They said they had just chatted with the Admin of the group and that he said I wasn’t blocked. I went back to the site and tried to post a comment, and I was allowed. Next, I posted an image meme and that also went through. It’s funny that someone inquiring if I was blocked and the Admin saying I wasn’t, was enough to change my status and allow me to post. It’s Magic.
Today, Sunday I posted a couple of more Meme topics and had a couple of good discussions. Also today, In a different group, I had a discussion with a young woman on Spiritual energy attachments, how they are created, and how to remove them. At the end, she made the following comment.
<quote> It’s amazing how something seems so obvious to you normally, but combined with emotional issues, how suddenly your knowledge and understanding of how things should work go out the window. You clearing this path for me is much appreciated and needed. Endless thanks. <end quote>
I found it fulfilling that someone was able to grasp what I was sharing, and also see how their actions had created the situation that they were oblivious to, but now saw clearly.
The other day I met a woman on Facebook that was in a group I was in. She liked my posts and comments and contacted me, and we chatted for over two hours. She’s an attractive 45 year old widow, with three grown children. She lives in the US; is an artist, musician, dancer, and was a child actor. She owns her own home and her father runs a new age church and her mother has her business.
We got talking about relationships and she made a comment that age doesn’t matter, and with the other comments and questions, and I got the feeling that she was interested in me. As we chatted, I noticed and felt shame coming up for me. Feeling that I wasn’t good enough, not talented, not popular, not good looking, no money, no home, too old and the list goes on and on.
These shame feelings and judgments that I was experiencing now were similar to the shame I had in my childhood. On top of that, I also remembered being shamed by my mother if a girl showed interest in me. I took her shame comments as having a girlfriend was a bad thing and that I was wrong and bad. This was also associated with my religious beliefs at the time that you had to honor your father and mother and they knew what was good for you.
The next day, I spoke with her again and thanked her for activating me into my shame and childhood memories, and that I was working on it. We chatted off and on, but we never got into any lengthy discussion.
My view of reality is changing. A few weeks ago I was chatting with a friend who does work at a hospice, and a few things she said made me question my beliefs. I’ve believed that our “Spirit” is our Mind, that originates our conscious thoughts, ideas, words, etc.. BUT… after our conversation, I felt something was “off” with that concept. That, together with working on healing the other aspects of my Being, my Body, Will (Soul) and Heart, made me think that there is more.
Another thing that has been a recent topic has been Ego that is associated with the Mind and also false Ego. So…. I’m trying to put the pieces of the puzzle together and an idea that came up is that while our Mind is connected to our Spirit, it is NOT our entire Spirit, as that is where our “Higher Self” comes in. So… What if a portion of our Higher Self manifests itself in the physical and calls itself Spirit “Mind” or as some might say EGO. BUT… when our Spirit re-incarnated, it gradually forgot who it was and its prime purpose and came to be what I call our “altered Ego,” altered by imprints, programs and beliefs and judgments. Part of our process now is to experience and re-cover our Essence that we lost in past lives, to become whole again. EGO is not bad, as some make it out to be, as it defines us as who we really are.. it’s only our “altered Ego” that does crazy shit.
Now the other parts of our Being, our Soul, (intuition, feelings and emotions) Heart and Body also have their own consciousness and “try” to communicate with the Mind that is basically the “Controller” of our physical reality. But, besides these voices, we also have other incarnate and dis-incarnate voices vying for our attention, including our HIGHER SELF.
OK…Another thing is that for a long time, I’ve had this thought/feeling that I’m here to manifest, or bring down my entire Spiritual Essence into the Earth plane, in this physical body, in the hear and now. To Spiritilize my physical Body. This however, requires unconditional love and a total connection between my Mind (Ego) and the rest of my Being and my “higher self” …
Whenever I go shopping and am cashing out, I hear the same robotic message from the cashier as they greet the customers in front of me.
“Hi, How are you?”
The customer smiles and relies, “Fine, and you/”
The cashier says, “Fine. Nice day isn’t it” – or something to that effect.
This is how people set themselves up to carry on being in denial of how they really feel.. Sure, it’s a socially acceptable custom and tradition, but that doesn’t mean it is right, real, or loving. This is part and parcel of the unseen role of denial that literally sucks the life out of us.
The FINE picture is another aspect of the unseen role of denial, and how we unconsciously live our lives as a lie.
I continued reading my RUOW book, and when I turned the page, there was another paragraph that stood out to me. RUOW Book 1 – pg 112
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I also want everyone that is wanting to stay on Earth to agree to end personal denial and accept the self completely.
You need to start with yourself and make an unconditional acceptance of how it really feels to be you. Instead of feeling you must heal everything immediately, you need not. You must however, have a completely committed intent to end denial and heal all the separations of consciousness that this created. This includes:Pain of experiences that the Body holds. Pain of emotions that the Will holds. Loss of Love that Heart holds. Misunderstandings and limitations that the Mind holds disconnection from the Spirit that originated all of it.
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What really caught my attention and got me thinking was this sentence.
<> Misunderstandings and limitations that the Mind holds disconnection from the Spirit that originated all of it. <>
I had associated Mind as Spirit, but I’m now thinking/feeling it in a whole new way. That Mind is our Ego or rather Altered Ego, altered by our imprints, programs and beliefs and also by “misunderstandings,” “limitations,” and judgments. That maybe the “Spirit” that is referred to, is really our Higher Self that is trying to guide and heal our Mind (and the rest of our Being.)
We associate our mind/Spirit as our I AM being, but it’s really just an aspect of our Higher Self made manifest in the physical world. While our Higher Self KNOWS things, (past, present and future)… our mind is ignorant, as part of the process of understanding and healing is to unravel the puzzle of love and life, and not have another do it for us. To do that we need to know all the aspects of denial that have created our present situation
When we originally manifested in the physical, we were not as disconnected from our Higher Self as we are now, and it’s our denials that have created this fragmentation that now needs to be healed in order to recover lost Essence and the lost parts of our Being. This is getting deep, but I know there is a lot more to it.
I’ve begun re-reading my RUOW books that I haven’t read for years… I began a few weeks ago and while passages stood out to me, this is the first I’m sharing. This is a quote (in part) from Book 1 – pg 111
Feelings are not something exterior like other experiences….
The increase in denial has mainly taken place in this way: rather than rejecting experiences that did not feel good, many Spirits rejected their feelings toward these experiences instead. Feelings are only responsive. They do not cause an experience to be unpleasant.
It’s interesting how the universe sets the stage and then slowly begins to shift your conscious awareness to what it wants to show you. A few days ago it was the banana thing and worrying about the food I eat. This morning I woke up thinking of food and how its been contaminated by GMO’s and chemical pesticides We worry if the food we buy will harm our bodies and so we take as many precautions as possible and keep informed of the lasted round of tainted food.
As I was thinking this, I suddenly had a thought that instead of worrying if a food is safe or not why not use INTENT and sound energy to remove anything that doesn’t serve our body’s highest purpose and good. This is not really new as Dr Emoto researched the effect of emotions and sounds on water and so have many other scientists.
Our bodies and the food we eat are made up of mostly water and other chemicals, and – common to all is that they are all energy, but at different frequencies. So there is this LINK between us, our human bodies, and food and water that we presently need to survive, that needs to be explored. Even plants respond to the human energy field that either helps them flourish, or shrivel and die. For that matter, the same holds true for animals. As I’m typing this the word that keeps popping into my head is LOVE… LOVE is LIFE and everything is connected by love, including its absence in varying degrees or what is commonly referred to as “conditional” love.
Taken from my Journal – April 16 Monday 9:30 am
Your Mind (Spirit) may have a thought or idea, but there is no real desire or emotion to experience it. This is because the Mind instantly brings up old imprints, programs, and beliefs that say that what was suggested is not appropriate for any number of reasons. In the same breath, false Will (Soul) that is aligned with Minds judgments has no desire to experience it, as unresolved negative emotions come up to validate the Minds judgments. Heart goes along with the Minds assessment and so there is no action, no movement of the original thought or idea that was squashed by old imprints, programs and beliefs that are in reversal to the new thought or idea. The result is that the same old pattern is repeated as one continues on their not-so-merry-go-round; wondering why things happen as they do and hoping that things will change.
So! How does this apply to the Body? Old imprints, programs, and beliefs that the Mind has, have forced the Body (through habits) to become a slave to the Minds judgments. These are deeply ingrained in not only the Mind, but also the Will, Heart and Body. These are mostly social beliefs, that of being told what to do or not to do, what is right and wrong, good or bad, acceptable or not acceptable. These beliefs and judgments then form the habits for the Body, which has basically been forced to override its own needs and desires and be a slave to the Minds programming.
So then, to break this old programming, I need to first, get my Mind to recognize what it is doing, and then for it to open to hear what it is that the Body wants and needs. Hummm… What the Body wants and needs in order to heal itself is the prime objective. But, the trick here is to differentiate between what the Body really wants and needs, and what the Mind thinks the Body wants and needs based on its old habits and quick fix, feel good sensations that give the Mind the false notion that what pleases the Mind also pleases the Body. It’s just like when I was getting my Mind to listen and feel what my Will (Soul) Intuition was wanting to express, so too I need to listen to my Body to not only hear, but also feel and allow it to express what it wants and needs to. As long as my Mind (Spirit) thinks it’s right and has the answer to what my Soul, Heart and Body desire and need, it is the unloving master that is unwittingly not only forcing the other parts of our Being to die, by forcing it’s denials on them, but also itself, as there is no separation. (9:50 am)
As a follow up to my previous post, while we all have a Spirit, Soul, and Heart that is eternal, we also have a Body with which we experience physical reality that presently isn’t eternal, but dies and then reincarnates. So when I got the message to, “Seek the Doorway to Eternal Life,” I took that to mean that it includes the physical Body. The Body IS a part of the Spirit, Soul and Heart, and is not meant to be used, abused and cast off when it can no longer bear the denials it has been receiving and is unable to function in the way that Spirit thinks it should. The Body is also meant to have eternal life also, but, the proverbial but… Who, what, where, when, why and how?
Just as the Spirit, Soul and Heart are energy, so too is the Body, albeit at a lower frequency or vibration that is necessary to obtain and maintain a state of physical matter. The Body is made up mostly of water, but it also contains a multitude of different chemicals and minerals. But, all this is the physical RESULT, it’s not CAUSAL, as what is causal and creates all this are the unseen forces that are yet to be brought to our conscious awareness in order to have true understanding. If we knew the 5 W’s we would know how to heal and change our DNA and reverse this process of the body being cast off, (death) and the slow process of the Body dying until it finally reaches the point that it can no longer support life for Spirit, Soul and Heart. (To be continued)
2017 March 17 – 8:40 pm. I begin channeling and writing.So what do you, Baal, and Lucifer want?
WE WANT YOU, YOU LITTLE ASSHOLE. WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE – GOD? FUCK YOU – YOU CAN’T DEFEAT US AND YOU KNOW THAT AND YOUR PETTY BOOKS ARE NOT GOING TO HELP ANYONE. WE’LL SEE TO THAT. HA, HA, HA.
If that were a truth, then you wouldn’t be here, trying to stop me would you?
YOU THINK YOU ARE SO FUCKING SMART DON’T YOU. YOU STILL BELIEVE AND TALK THE SAME OLD SHIT THAT YOU DID YEARS AGO.
Well you couldn’t stop me then and you won’t stop me now.
WE’LL SEE ABOUT THAT. WE AREN’T FINISHED WITH YOU, YOU LITTLE PRICK. A THORN IN OUR SIDE, BUT YOUR TIME OF BEING A NUISANCE THAT WE HAVE HAD TO PUT UP WITH IS ABOUT TO END.
Oh, so you couldn’t stop me and so now you are saying you were happy to put up with me, calling me a nuisance. If I was just a nuisance, then you BIG BOYS would not be trying to stop me again. So what you are saying is all bullshit, like usual.
YOU FUCK HEAD. YOU THINK YOU ARE SO FUCKING SMART AND YOU KNOW WHAT WE ARE THINKING AND DOING. YOU ARE A TOOTHLESS ASSHOLE AND WE ARE GOING TO FUCK YOU OVER AND PUT AN END TO YOU ONCE AND FOR ALL.
You’ve said that before. What’s the matter? Don’t you remember? You couldn’t do it then and you can’t do it now. You don’t have the power you once had over me. That is long gone as I can see and feel you for what you are. Denial is your game and so is control.
BULLSHIT!!!! FUCK YOU – YOU FUCKING KNOW IT ALL. WE’LL SEE WHO IS IN DENIAL AND HAS THE POWER AND IS IN CONTROL. LOOK AROUND YOU. THE WORLD IS ALMOST OURS AND YOU CAN’T DO A FUCKING THING ABOUT IT. HA. HA. HA. HA.
Keyword, “almost.” That means you don’t have the power to take control and have absolute power. Because if you did, you egg heads would not be here trying to stop this little nuisance as you called me. Right?
FUCK YOU!!! YOU PRICK!!! YOU PUT WORDS IN OUR MOUTHS AND TWIST THINGS AROUND TO SUIT YOU. IT DOESN’T WORK. HA, HA, HA, WE ARE NOT GOING TO WASTE ANYMORE TIME ON YOU. YOU ARE NOT WORTH IT.
If I wasn’t worth it, you wouldn’t be here in the first place, would you?
I feel they are leaving. I’m laughing as I can see through their game of intimidation, but denial has no power against truth.
Where did you go?
What? No come backs or threats?
Interesting, I was at my computer desk and using my pendulum to contact my guides to get an answer as to what I need to do with the idea of adding selected excerpts from my books to my website, either on my main site or using Dokuwiki.
The pendulum (when in contact with my guides) usually responds quickly and in a yes or no manner that leaves no doubt, but this time the pendulum moved slowly and also had mixed and conflicting answers, so I knew something was up and that’s when I felt the presence of Baal and Lucifer and started writing what you just read. BTW, any evil entity that has either directly typed their response to me from another person’s computer, or that I have channeled, has always spoken and typed in CAPITAL LETTERS. I guess they feel it is more powerful.
After they were gone, I got in touch with my guides and the answer was a definite “yes” to add them to my shenreed Book website. So that is what I’ll be working on over the weekend.
In recognition of International Women’s Day, this is dedicated to all women. May you recognize that you now have the ability and power to do what you were unable to do as a girl. To be there for those lost aspects of your Being that have so desperately wanted and needed your unconditional love.
This post is in reference to what I am becoming aware of as I’m becoming more physically active. My mind finds it confusing when my Body disagrees with what the Mind thinks it should do physically, but I am learning to trust my Body that it knows what it needs and how it needs any physical activity. Some days my Body wants both exercise and the walk, and other days it’s either or, and some days, like today, it’s neither, a day of rest.
Our physical Body (matter) is really a form of energy, of frequency and vibration that manifests as our dense physical Body with which we experience our reality. While the body can heal itself, it needs the Mind (Spirit) to help it, to have the intent to help the body heal itself, and to do what it needs to do to fulfill that desire. Like the Will (Soul) the Body is at the mercy of the Mind (Spirit) which can override any information it receives and controls both these aspects of its Being. It’s the Mind that sets in motion what the Will and Body can do and express. Yes, there are automatic functions that the Body does without apparent direction from the Mind, but in reality, the Mind is also in control of these on a sub-conscious level.
If the Mind wants the Body to do something against its will, the Body is forced to OBEY the Mind until such point that the Body is unable to physically do what the Mind demands and is either exhausted, injured, sick, or even at the point of dying. The Mind has been programmed, or it has programmed itself to be MASTER of its Will (Soul) and Body and so it finds it confusing and difficult to think, to reason, to fathom and consider that what it believes to be the truth and loving – isn’t. And if it accepts that it isn’t, then how does it change its programming, imprints and beliefs? It’s not good enough to simply recite some positive affirmations as the Mind needs to have the intent to be aware of when it is overpowering the Body’s information, and then it needs to choose to listen and accept what the Body is telling it what it wants and can do. In other words, it needs to be self aware that it is running on old imprints, programs and beliefs, and then choose to experience a different reality before it can really begin to let the old programming go, and to allow the Body to begin its healing process.
I’m not going to go into all the details that played themselves out over the past few months suffice to say that they all came to a head within three days. What became clear was that she was not as helpless as she pretended to be, and that a lot of her lies, secrets, avoidance, omissions and denials were exposed for what they were. She was not only playing me, but my son and daughter, her friends and even acquaintances on the internet. She was acting out the “oh poor me” and using whoever and whatever she could to get attention, even if it was negative, it was still attention. She is a self-centered self-absorbed Narcissist and an energy vampire. Her house of cards is crumbling and her reality is quickly changing. As I now see it, she has two choices;
It will be interesting to see what develops in the coming months now that her little game has blown up in her face.
Attachments that are OBVIOUS are easy to spot and release, but it’s the little issues that you don’t see that still form the attachment. In uncovering my attachments and ending my denials, I realized that as we were still on a friendly basis and since she is what is considered bi-polar, and has other illnesses, (judgments and attachments) and so I silently (in denial) put up with her blatant lies and denials, saying that is just the way she is, and instead, focused on trying to help her and find the good in her.
Not challenging her blatant denial, lies, omission and avoidance, as in not wanting to upset her, I was in denial and unconsciously allowed her to use those against me. The sick “twist” in all this is that at times she really needed help, but other times it was just a game and she was acting the “oh poor me” to get whatever power she could by knowing she was controlling the another being. The more I allowed, the more she used them against me in the form of getting me to do things for her that affected my time, energy and money, to the point that this past weekend, I saw exactly what she was doing and what I was allowing her to do, via the unseen role of denial, judgments and attachments. When I called her out on her denials and lies, and stated that I was finished helping her and empowering her “oh poor me” reality, our attachments were broken and I was free, while she was left to deal with her denials in your own way and to take, or not take, responsibility for her well being.
The unseen role of denial that I didn’t see with my ex-wife’s scenario was that in my Spirit (mind) and the Spirit polarity aspect of my Heart, that defines love by words and deeds and not by how it feels, thought that I was being kind, caring, sharing, considerate, compassionate, etc., etc., for those that I judged to be less fortunate. That “less fortunate” judgment (that I now release) has an unloving aspect to it that of a false sense of pride, in that it silently and smugly deems me to be superior or better than, or in a better position than another. The opposite side of my outer judgments says that if I have judgments of being better than others, I must also have the judgment on self that I’m not as fortunate as good as some other people.
So the realization was that this doesn’t just apply to my ex-wife, but to everyone that I’m in contact with. The subtle judgments, the false pride, the trying to be nice, even to an asshole because he/she is drunk or on drugs or whatever, are all things that I need to release to really empower myself on all levels. How this played out in my outer reality was that my ex-wife was ACTING like she needed help and asking for it, either directly or indirectly. These weren’t an “in the moment” type situations or experiences of helping another that you could see and feel were in need of help, but on an attachment and judgment level based on past experiences and old imprints, programs and beliefs of what the person appeared to be going through and needing help with.
While this may seem like it’s not a big deal, I assure you it is, as guilt and shame are constantly at me, trying to get me to reverse my position, to be responsible and be the “nice” guy again. Like I said, this isn’t just about my ex-wife, but how I respond to all that I come in contact with. It’s a new way of seeing that just because someone looks like they are the victim and in need of help, doesn’t mean that they are. They just play the “Oh poor me” game from another angle and don’t be fooled, it is effective. Besides the Oh poor me, the other major game players in the energy sucking power game are the intimidator, the interrogator, and the aloft. Some are quite good at using two or more power plays to get what they want and will flip back and forth at easy. Recognizing them is the first step at ending their control over you. . It’s been a while since I read it, but I think these are outlined in the book, “Celestine Prophecy” by James Redfield.
A life based on lies, omission, avoidance and denial is really very fragile, like a pyramid build of a deck of playing cards. All it takes is for the bottom foundation on which the rest is balanced to be removed and the whole thing comes tumbling down. When the truth is revealed there is nothing to support the rest, and they too fall.
Until the truth is finally recognized and revealed, not by the person doing the lying and denying, but the one that is the unwitting object of the deceit. While blatant and obvious denials can be spotted in others, it’s the unseen role that denial plays in the self that is the key issue. To empower yourself, you need to not only see the denial in others, but also your part in it. In the next few posts, I’ll be sharing a person experience that I had the past weekend.
I feel that people have a misguided sense, or use of the word awakening… or maybe I just look at it a different way. I feel that what people are presently going through is what I call a “quickening,” an acceleration process in recognizing what is not life, or contributing to life. Denials are being exposed and the truth revealed, but that doesn’t mean that people are awaking to end their own denials and begin to live life, and not the illusion as has been the case.
People get caught up in the New Age mumbo jumbo and hype, and talk of awakening and ascension, not unlike a born again Christian that claims to be “saved,” and yet they are oblivious to what truth, love and life are. They are still disconnected from recognizing the Divine aspects of their Physical Being, or how denial of these are being reflected in their experiences and reality. Yes, their consciousness is stirring, but by no means are they wake as they claim to be.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m far from being fully awakened, but I have done a lot of personal inner work and healing on ending my denials that is being reflected in my outer reality. What I see people going through is what I went through years ago, “Been there done that.” While they are becoming aware of the issues in their OUTER reality, or the blatant lies and denials of others, they are still oblivious as to how to heal their personal inner issues by recognizing and choosing to end their denials. They wear masks to hide the truth and act the role that their altered ego ignorantly believes will make them happy.